Interview with John Kim
Introduction: I chose my mom’s older brother, my uncle, to interview. His name is John Kim, and he immigrated to the United States from Seoul, South Korea when he was two years old. The move was shaped by a marriage that provided the foundation for a life filled with identity shifts. Although he does not remember much about when he was in Korea, I interviewed him about his transition and his experience growing up in the United States. The move was shaped by a marriage that provided the foundation for a life filled with identity shifts and integration challenges. The interview took place over the phone since he was in North Carolina in the hospital with my grandmother. Through the interview, I explore settlement experiences and a sense of membership in American society, connecting his journey to broader themes and migration theories.
Summary: John is from Seoul, South Korea, which is the capital of South Korea. He was born in July of 1977, and his mother’s family lived in the area for a prolonged period. Both John and his mom, my grandma, moved to the United States after his mother married a US service member in the Army, my grandfather. In 1979, they lived in (Fort Bragg) Fayetteville, North Carolina, and they had a baby girl, my mother. Shortly after, they moved to Germany since my grandfather was stationed there. In 1980, they had another baby girl, my aunt, and shortly after, moved back to (Fort Bragg) Fayetteville, North Carolina. From that point on, they moved often due to their life as a military family. Throughout John’s life, he experienced different social dynamics and often viewed differently based on where they lived and the social contexts he encountered. At 18 and fresh out of high school, he joined the US Marine Corps, and he served for 23 years. Now he is enjoying retirement and working in his free time. His story paints a vivid picture of a life defined by mobility, perseverance, and a complex balance of cultural identities.
Migration: John’s experience of migration started when his mom married a US service member in the Army, my grandfather, who was stationed in South Korea. They first moved to the United States when John was two years old, settling in (Fort Bragg) Fayetteville, North Carolina. The move was facilitated by the military which handled much of the paperwork, including passports, visas, and marriage certificates. The choice to come to the U.S. was directly tied to the marriage, and the pull factors, like stability and opportunities, were linked to the husband’s military career. The push factors also played a role in his mother’s decision to leave South Korea. The Korean War heavily impacted her family, and by the time she moved to the United States, she had very little family left in South Korea. This loss and her new marriage made the move seem logical. Social networks, which are key in migration, were minimal for both him and his mother once they arrived in the States. As time went on, she built a community among other individuals of Korean descent in the United States, but this came after settling in one state.
Settlement: Adjusting to life in the United States was a process shaped by both challenges and support. As a part of a military family, John and his family frequently moved, living in Germany, Oklahoma, North Carolina at various points, and other states. Military communities became their primary social environment. These communities provided some stability, but no limited exposure to their Korean heritage. Some areas were more diverse than others. John’s mother worked hard to adapt to learning English. She decided to stop speaking Korean at home to help John learn the language. This choice was practical but had a long-lasting impact on their connection to Korean culture. The language was a significant hurdle for both his mother and himself. John learned English in preschool in Germany, he eventually became fluent by the time he was six years old. Academically, he excelled, driven by his mother’s high expectations for success. Besides being s strong student, the frequent moves made it hard to establish lasting friendships outside of the military community. Socially, John described feeling like an outsider, viewed differently based on context, sometimes as Korean, other times as white or Black, depending on the setting. These shifting identities shaped his introverted nature while also teaching him how to connect with people from diverse backgrounds.
Membership: John became a US citizen when his mother naturalized, around the age of eight or nine. He helped his mother study for the citizenship test, which was a formative experience, giving them a strong understating of US history and civics early on. This process was more than just a legal milestone; it was a moment that solidified their sense of belonging to the United States. Despite their American citizenship, their ties to Korea were minimal. John had only one interaction with his Korean grandmother and no ongoing relationships with extended family in Korea. As he got older, he made sure to have no contact with any of his family members in Korea, due to his work in the military. His mother, slowly cut ties over time, especially after her mother passed away. For his mother, she relied on a small group of Korean friends in the United States, but those relationships did not extend deeply into John’s life. Today, John identifies strongly as an American, shaped by his 23 years of service in the US Marine Corps. He views his American identity as inclusive, celebrating the diversity of the country. However, he acknowledged feeling more Korean in the United States, and more American when abroad, a duality that reflects the complexity of his identity.
Conclusion: John’s migration story reflects the intersection of personal choices, historical events, and institutional structures. His (and his mother’s) journey from South Korea to the United States was shaped by marriage and the military. Their settlement process was marked by adaptation, language acquisition, and shifting social identities. His sense of membership evolved through naturalization and life as a military child and adult, resulting in a strong identification with American ideals and values. His story highlights the complexities of migration and integration, showing how individual experiences can both align with and challenge more comprehensive theories of migration.
Interview with John Kim Transcript
[00:00:00] Khamya: Okay. Um, okay. Yeah. So I’ll just ask like a few of the questions and then like, like a few questions from each thing. I’m not going to like ask all of them because there’s so many. Okay.
[00:00:17] Uncle John: That’s what you want. I would probably start with this is the date and this is who we’re talking to.
[00:00:22] Khamya: Okay. So who am I here with today?
[00:00:29] Uncle John: So my name is John Kim.
[00:00:31] Khamya: Hello, this is my uncle.
[00:00:38] Uncle John: Yes, that’s true. Um, so I know we’re doing this for your school projects. Just so you know, I’m okay with the recording for your school. I just do not want the recording to be publicly available, um, beyond that, beyond your, beyond your use for school. [00:01:00]
[00:01:01] Khamya: Sounds good. Um, so where were you, let’s, we can start this off, uh, where were you born?
[00:01:11] Uncle John: Um, I was actually born in Seoul, Korea, uh, in July of 1977.
[00:01:19] Khamya: Okay, and do you remember, like, Um, anything about your life, like, before you, like, in Korea?
[00:01:33] Uncle John: Um, not really. So, like I said, I was born in 77.
[00:01:39] Khamya: Mm hmm.
[00:01:40] Uncle John: And then my mom got married to a U. S. service member. And then we moved to the United States in 79. I was about two years old when we actually moved to the States. And,
[00:01:59] Khamya: um, [00:02:00]
[00:02:00] Uncle John: Oh, sorry. Go ahead.
[00:02:05] Khamya: You can keep going. It’s okay.
[00:02:07] Uncle John: Okay. I was going to say 79 when we moved to Fayetteville, North Carolina. Like I said, my dad was in the military. This is actually in the army, um, artillery men in the army.
[00:02:22] Khamya: Then in
[00:02:23] Uncle John: 79, my first sister was born.
[00:02:31] Khamya: Yes, my mom.
[00:02:32] Uncle John: Shortly after, yep, your mama. Born in Fayetteville, North Carolina.
Then shortly after, my second sister was born in 1980s. But then after that, after she was born, we actually ended up moving to Germany. Um, I think in late 80, early 81. Mm-hmm . [00:03:00] We moved back out the United States in, uh, around that time.
[00:03:04] Khamya: Do you remember, um, what part of Germany?
[00:03:07] Uncle John: Yeah. , , Germany, and I think we were there for about three years.
[00:03:13] Khamya: Mm-hmm .
[00:03:14] Uncle John: And that’s probably where I remember the most as a kid in Germany. Yeah. I mean, you know, I was like two and a half, three, I guess three to six, something like that.
[00:03:30] Khamya: Yeah.
[00:03:31] Uncle John: Maybe seven-ish. Um. That’s what I remember as a kid the most. I don’t really remember being a baby. I don’t think most people do.
[00:03:40] Khamya: Mm hmm.
[00:03:41] Uncle John: Um, I don’t remember being in diapers or anything like that. In Germany, I went to preschool when I was four.
[00:03:49] Khamya: Mm hmm.
[00:03:49] Uncle John: And kindergarten when I was five, and then first grade. And then halfway Great. [00:04:00] When we move back to the United States.
[00:04:04] Khamya: Okay. Very nice. Um, let’s see. Was it hard like adjusting into like the new area?
So like when you first went to North Carolina and then to Germany and then back to the U. S.?
[00:04:24] Uncle John: Um, well I would say first trip to North Carolina, I don’t really remember too much of it
[00:04:35] Khamya: as a
[00:04:35] Uncle John: kid. I would imagine it wouldn’t have been that hard for me, since I just stayed at home. But,
[00:04:41] Khamya: uh, in Germany,
[00:04:44] Uncle John: I did have, uh, some trouble adjusting in Germany, I’d say. I was kind of a bad kid,
[00:04:54] Khamya: and
[00:04:57] Uncle John: five years old and six years old. [00:05:00] Uh, I got in trouble in school a lot, um, I got in a lot of fights. Actually, one of the things that I remember is my first fist fight, first of many I guess, was in Germany as a little kid.
I remember questioning this kid in the nose, and he started bleeding, and I started crying because I thought I was going to get in trouble. So I went home.
[00:05:36] Khamya: That’s funny.
[00:05:38] Uncle John: So I went home, and I tried not to get in trouble. I got disappointed in school quite a bit. I remember being in the hall a lot, um, being in the corner a lot. [00:06:00] So, yeah, I didn’t get along too well I think with, I guess American kids because we lived on base, and then German kids because I went to school.
[00:06:15] Khamya: Oh.
[00:06:17] Uncle John: The school is like an international school, but I think it was in town, I think, but I don’t 100 percent remember. I do remember the school was open for all grades, from first grade to fourth grade. And each grade, or each segment of school was segregated a little bit.
[00:06:46] Khamya: Oh, really?
[00:06:47] Uncle John: Elementary kids were in one half of the school. The junior high kids went to another half of the school.
[00:06:54] Khamya: Uh huh.
[00:06:59] Uncle John: [00:07:00] And, um, yeah, so. Like I said, I don’t think I just did as easily as a lot of folks, but, um, I don’t know why. It was just me, I guess. Yeah. That was, that kind of That’s also where I learned to speak English.
[00:07:17] Khamya: Ah, in Germany?
[00:07:19] Uncle John: Yeah,
[00:07:20] Khamya: oh wow that was um that kind of goes into like my next question. I was gonna ask um Did you ever feel like you were?
Different than others growing up or like did you ever think it was like easier hard to fit in like growing up in general?
[00:07:41] Uncle John: younger years Mm hmm Either I had friends or I didn’t have friends, or people like me or didn’t.
[00:07:53] Khamya: Yeah.
[00:07:54] Uncle John: That’s really weird. Um, probably the difference [00:08:00] in culture and looking different and all that stuff probably didn’t come into play until high school, honestly.
[00:08:08] Khamya: Oh.
[00:08:11] Uncle John: Middle school, not so much. And I think half of it is because, like, even though Jeff lives in a different country also, As a military kid, so I was adjusting to a new location every few years.
Different people, every few years. So, I didn’t stay in one place and you know, I had this lifelong friend and all that kind of stuff. Like a TV. So, that’s why I live like that. But yeah, I mean, I remember kids making fun of me. That’s my dad was black. Kids making fun of me because I was white. Kids make fun of me because I was crazy, and so I got made fun of just for, I don’t know, being loud I guess.[00:09:00]
But uh, it’s very nice. I have trouble with everything. Um, not to say it happened every day, but it did happen occasionally. Yeah. Yeah. There was even some kids that, uh, later in life, when I was an adult, I’ve been to some places where people have never seen an Asian person. Oh. So it’s more of a curiosity than anything else I guess.
[00:09:31] Khamya: Right.
[00:09:32] Uncle John: I mean, I don’t think it’s anything different than everybody goes through, honestly, you know, everybody goes through time.
[00:09:42] Khamya: Right. That’s true. Have you ever, um, have you ever visited, um, like, Korea since? Like, Seoul, Korea, or just South Korea in general?
[00:09:56] Uncle John: Yeah, mostly for work. [00:10:00] So when I was 17, I actually joined the Marine Corps, and then I ended up serving in the Marines for 23 years.
[00:10:11] Khamya: 23?
[00:10:13] Uncle John: Yeah. So during that time, I traveled to a lot of countries.
[00:10:20] Khamya: Mm hmm.
[00:10:22] Uncle John: And, uh, pretty much every continent, except for Antarctica.
[00:10:28] Khamya: Wow.
[00:10:31] Uncle John: Yeah, so I went back to Korea in, uh, 1998?
[00:10:45] Khamya: Mm hmm.
[00:10:45] Uncle John: When I was stationed in Okinawa, Japan.
[00:10:49] Khamya: Mm hmm.
[00:10:51] Uncle John: And I was there for just under a month, but I was there for a field exercise [00:11:00] that focused on the defense of the Korean Peninsula.
[00:11:04] Khamya: Oh, wow.
[00:11:07] Uncle John: Yeah, it’s uh, it’s still something that occurs every year. We’re allies, and North Korea and South Korea are technically still at war.
[00:11:19] Khamya: Oh.
[00:11:21] Uncle John: But yeah, so I went there in 98. Um, spent most of my time in the field. Had a couple days of liberty. We can go out in town and stuff. Then I went back again in 2007 for about a week, um, I don’t think I’ve gone back since then, but it’s something I want to do in the near future with my family.
[00:11:59] Khamya: Yeah, [00:12:00] Marcos and I really, uh. For a personal trip. Yeah, Marcos and I want to go there for a personal trip, uh, one day. Have you or a grandma like, like ever contacted like any of your other family members like since you guys left or?
[00:12:19] Uncle John: So I have not.
[00:12:20] Khamya: Mm hmm.
[00:12:21] Uncle John: And I, honestly, intentionally sought out any Korean family members.
[00:12:29] Khamya: Yeah.
[00:12:30] Uncle John: Because of my job.
[00:12:32] Khamya: Mm hmm. Oh, oh yeah.
[00:12:38] Uncle John: Yeah, because of the clearance level in my job. Um, it just causes a lot more problems when you have close personal interaction with foreign nationals.
[00:12:51] Khamya: Oh, I didn’t even think about that.
[00:12:56] Uncle John: Yeah, so myself, as an adult, I intentionally have not tried to do [00:13:00] anything. My mom, she did have contact with her mother. For a few years, when she first moved to the States.
Before she came to the States, I think her brother died and her sister died,
but her mom was still alive. Her dad was actually taken in the night during the Korean War.
Yeah, she was 7 years old, and because, this is something I didn’t tell you though, but, um, came from a wealthy family. So, family had a lot of money, and when the North Koreans came to her village, they found out that her dad was rich, one of the richest people there, so they took him in the middle of the night, and uh, she hasn’t seen him since.[00:14:00]
Oh, that’s terrible!
Yeah.
[00:14:04] Khamya: I did not know that.
[00:14:07] Uncle John: Yeah. And, uh, when that happened, her extended family did not all agree. Came together and they decided to hide out. So they left the house and went and lived in the mountains for a couple months.
[00:14:23] Khamya: Wow. Make sure
[00:14:24] Uncle John: that they weren’t being targeted. Mm hmm. And then came back.
Came back later. I’m not sure if they came back when the war was over. So, coming closer to an end, because the Korean War didn’t last very long.
[00:14:45] Khamya: Oh, yeah.
[00:14:47] Uncle John: Yeah, so. I know she was in the military for a couple months, but
[00:14:52] Khamya: I don’t know,
[00:14:54] Uncle John: you know, how long. And she doesn’t really remember too much of it. Yeah. I imagine she probably just watched [00:15:00] it as a teenager.
[00:15:02] Khamya: Mm hmm.
Yeah, I think I remember, I think I did a project. I, I think. It sounds familiar, but I don’t really quite remember, but I think either me or Marcos did, like, a project on her. Like in middle school or high school, but this is when we were going to public school, but I had to do like a similar thing and I remember she would say like she didn’t really remember a lot and um My um mom would say like oh like she might just be saying that because like she’s just trying to like Block out some of the memories.
[00:15:41] Uncle John: Yeah, I mean she remembers having a good relationship with her father and things like that Yeah Being spoiled as a kid, but not really much beyond that.
[00:15:55] Khamya: Yeah,[00:16:00]
um, let’s see, what’s another question? We answered a lot of the questions.
[00:16:09] Uncle John: That’s fine, if you need to go back through.
[00:16:12] Khamya: Okay,
[00:16:12] Uncle John: clarifying something if it’s not already been answered or something.
[00:16:16] Khamya: Okay.
[00:16:31] Uncle John: You can say the questions out loud. You don’t have to read and answer yourself.
[00:16:42] Khamya: Okay. Um, oh, okay. Um, Do you think your life, um, how do you think your life would look like if you and your mom stayed in Korea? Like, how different do you think it would have, it would be? [00:17:00]
[00:17:01] Uncle John: Different it would be?
[00:17:02] Khamya: Yeah.
[00:17:03] Uncle John: That’s a difficult question, I guess.
I don’t know, it’s kind of hard to say.
[00:17:11] Khamya: Yeah.
[00:17:13] Uncle John: I always say that because I don’t really know how much her life changed. I know it changed a lot.
[00:17:25] Khamya: Yeah.
[00:17:27] Uncle John: Because back in the day, there weren’t banks. So when her father was taken, money was taken.
[00:17:35] Khamya: Oh.
[00:17:37] Uncle John: A lot. Lost everything, right?
[00:17:39] Khamya: Yeah.
[00:17:41] Uncle John: I don’t know if they were able to recover as a family, like with uncles or a brother doing stuff. You know, I really don’t know. So
that probably would have affected my [00:18:00] upbringing quite a bit, I would imagine.
[00:18:03] Khamya: Yeah.
[00:18:04] Uncle John: And determining how or where I would’ve focused growing up because as a kid, like I said, I’m not sure why I was, um, a challenge, but I had challenging moments with my parents.
[00:18:24] Khamya: Yeah.
[00:18:24] Uncle John: Uh, as far as behavior.
[00:18:28] Khamya: Yeah.
[00:18:29] Uncle John: Um, academics, I was pretty good.
Actually, my mom, she taught me, like, I did my multiplication tables and stuff. Mm hmm. So, 15 times 15, before I started preschool. Oh! Yeah, like, math was something that she taught me very early. So, I don’t, I don’t think I really learned anything in math until, I don’t know, maybe third or fourth grade or something.
[00:18:59] Khamya: Oh [00:19:00] my.
[00:19:01] Uncle John: Yeah, I was bored in school a lot, so you know that.
[00:19:04] Khamya: You said in boarding school?
[00:19:07] Uncle John: No, I was bored. Oh, oh, oh. It was a little bit challenging to
[00:19:10] Khamya: me. Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah. Oh, yeah.
[00:19:12] Uncle John: Even as a kid. Um, and I remember, I was always a good student, always A’s and B’s. Except for two years, where I did get F’s in classes.
But it wasn’t because the classes were challenging, it was just because I didn’t want to, I didn’t care if they didn’t want to do the work.
[00:19:36] Khamya: Yeah.
[00:19:37] Uncle John: So, yeah.
[00:19:40] Khamya: My mom told me that, oh sorry.
[00:19:42] Uncle John: No, go ahead.
[00:19:43] Khamya: Oh, um, I was saying that my mom told me that you played, A lot, like, I think a lot of instruments are, like you were, you were able to pick up or like learn how to play different instruments.
[00:19:55] Uncle John: Oh yeah. So growing up [00:20:00] I think Ruby, enjoy your mom. Um, they took dance tap and stuff.
[00:20:07] Khamya: Oh, I didn’t know.
[00:20:10] Uncle John: Yeah, they did like clogging and tap dancing and that kind of stuff.
[00:20:15] Khamya: Mm-hmm .
[00:20:16] Uncle John: Where they’re, I don’t know. Third, fourth, fifth grade. Something like that. And then one of them wanted to learn to play the violin, but that lasted about 10 minutes.
And then, uh, I kind of taught myself to play a couple, a couple of things. And then in junior high, I played the clarinet and then went from beginning to advanced band in half a semester.
[00:20:47] Khamya: Oh, wow.
[00:20:48] Uncle John: And then I also learned to play the cornet, which is a tendency trumpet, um, at the same time. So. Uh, yeah, I would [00:21:00] say I was quick to learn.
[00:21:02] Khamya: Yeah.
[00:21:03] Uncle John: Um, when I wanted to, I just put a lot of time into practicing and learning it, really. That’s about it. I don’t think it was really anything too special. Yeah. To practice.
[00:21:17] Khamya: Yeah. Yeah. Um, did you play any sports?
[00:21:24] Uncle John: Uh, not really, not until I got to high school. That was just because, like I said, the military family, we do have a lot. Right. So, I think in one year. I went to three different schools in like three weeks. Oh. I moved house to house to house.
[00:21:48] Khamya: Oh my.
[00:21:50] Uncle John: Um, I went to two different GIs, two different high schools. So [00:22:00] I did, uh, space football for a year.
[00:22:04] Khamya: Oh nice.
[00:22:05] Uncle John: And I was in rOTC for two years. And then they also had a rifle team. So I was on the rifle team for a year.
[00:22:14] Khamya: Rifle?
[00:22:17] Uncle John: Yeah, rifle. It’s just a pellet rifle, 22 pellets.
[00:22:20] Khamya: Oh.
[00:22:22] Uncle John: Um, yeah, they don’t call it the pellet team,
but yeah, so, uh, that’s about it. I did those for different times, but for a year or two at a time, I guess that just because, uh, it really worked out for moving too much.
I was a shy kid, so I wasn’t really seeking out very often. [00:23:00] Um, I think I kind of got Numb to it. Like it’s just a thing that you do.
[00:23:17] Khamya: Yeah.
[00:23:18] Uncle John: It kind of translated to when I was an adult, joined the Marine Corps.
[00:23:23] Khamya: Yeah.
[00:23:24] Uncle John: And I don’t even know how many times I moved since I’ve been an adult. Probably like a lot. 15, 20 times or something. At least. Yeah.
[00:23:35] Khamya: Yeah. Just became normal.
[00:23:39] Uncle John: Yeah. So I think it’s just something that’s
when you was normal to me.
[00:23:44] Khamya: When, um, when you joined the Marine, the Marine Corp. Right? Marine Corp. Marine Corp. Marines? Marine Corps, yeah. Marine Corps. Um, did you um, Was that like your top choice or did you want to do like um, A different branch or like, Was that [00:24:00] like?
[00:24:00] Uncle John: Uh, No, I didn’t care. Um, Actually, let me rephrase that. I was tired of school. I was tired of thinking.
[00:24:09] Khamya: Yeah.
[00:24:11] Uncle John: I told myself, I’m either going to join the Marine Corps or the Air Force.
[00:24:15] Khamya: Mm hmm.
[00:24:16] Uncle John: Maybe I can go with The hardest or the easiest. Yeah. Marine Corps just come first and Pretty much it.
[00:24:23] Khamya: Yeah. Yeah.
’cause a lot of people are like, the marines are a lot harder than like the other,
[00:24:32] Uncle John: uh, it’s, it’s more mental.
[00:24:34] Khamya: Mm.
[00:24:36] Uncle John: I mean, people can learn to be strong.
[00:24:38] Khamya: Mm-hmm .
[00:24:41] Uncle John: You can, you have to slowly learn to get patience, I guess.
[00:24:44] Khamya: Mm-hmm .
[00:24:47] Uncle John: Things are what they are. Sometimes you can’t change them.
[00:24:50] Khamya: Yeah.
[00:24:54] Uncle John: But yeah, I think it’s just all mental.
[00:24:56] Khamya: Mm-hmm .
[00:24:58] Uncle John: I mean, [00:25:00] just think of Van Holyfield. You don’t know who he is. He used to be the world heavyweight boxing champion. Oh. He always wanted to be a Marine. He went to Marine Corps Boat Camp when he retired. And then he quit after two weeks. It’s not because he couldn’t physically do it. It’s because mentally he wasn’t capable of getting on. He was at a different point in his life where I’m sure he doesn’t want people telling him what to do. Because he’s a millionaire. So he just decided to quit. That’s why I say it’s mental, not physical.
[00:25:41] Khamya: Do you think the Marines shaped you into the person you are today? Like it helped you in a way?
[00:25:49] Uncle John: Yeah, of course it did. I didn’t get as much trouble. I just didn’t get caught as much, I guess. Yeah.
[00:25:59] Khamya: That’s [00:26:00] good. That’s good. Uh, uh, uh. Sorry, I like, I’m like, moving around right now.
Did, um, did you guys like, um, or like, did your mom like, do any, trying to think like the right way to word this, did she, um, is that a dog?
[00:26:30] Uncle John: It is my dog, yes.
[00:26:31] Khamya: Aw, um, aw, did grandma ever, like, continue any, like, Korean, like, traditions, or, like, um, do, like, does that make sense? Like, did she ever, like, continue? Yeah.
Okay, okay.
[00:26:49] Uncle John: Yeah, of course.
[00:26:51] Khamya: Okay.
[00:26:52] Uncle John: Probably the biggest one was that the oldest child is always wrong. She gets in trouble for everything. So she continued that tradition my whole [00:27:00] life. So like in Korean culture, the firstborn son has the most respect. So yeah, I mean, she made that note. It’s something I didn’t really understand growing up. Until I got older. But then some of the other things like, um, food wise, She always cooked Korean food.
[00:27:24] Khamya: Right.
[00:27:25] Uncle John: And then she would cook specific foods on specific days.
[00:27:33] Khamya: Oh,
[00:27:34] Uncle John: I can’t remember what it’s called, but for New Year’s, there’s a dish that Koreans pretty much eat as a New Year’s dish. Mm hmm. Different things like that.
[00:27:45] Khamya: Okay.
[00:27:46] Uncle John: Taught us how to make kimchi and bulgogi, some of the basic Korean dishes. Oh, yeah. Mostly, mostly through food, probably, I guess, but.
[00:27:57] Khamya: Okay.
[00:27:59] Uncle John: In [00:28:00] grades, in school. Yep. That was a big thing that was pushed on us.
Yep. I’m probably more, more than others, but yeah.
[00:28:10] Khamya: Okay. Um, were you and, um, your siblings close growing up?
[00:28:17] Uncle John: Um, I dunno, I guess average.
[00:28:25] Khamya: Yeah. It’s like a, I feel like when you’re growing up, it’s like a, it’s just like a typical sibling relationship, but it’s not till you’re older, I feel like.
[00:28:34] Uncle John: Yeah. I mean, there were two girls, so. The sisters were pretty close, um, and it helped because they shared a room. Oh! I had my own room, so.
I guess we’re, I don’t know, just normal.
[00:28:58] Khamya: Yeah, [00:29:00]
[00:29:00] Uncle John: I guess that probably changed actually, when I was a teenager.
[00:29:07] Khamya: Oh,
[00:29:07] Uncle John: I think it was 15 or 16. It probably changed a little bit.
[00:29:11] Khamya: Oh,
[00:29:12] Uncle John: and they stopped trying to get me to convalesce much. Because if anything happened in the house, it’s my fault. Because I’m the oldest. It doesn’t matter what it is.
[00:29:24] Khamya: Yeah.
[00:29:27] Uncle John: And I think, like I said, when I was 15 or 16, actually your mom broke a window.
[00:29:34] Khamya: Mm mm.
[00:29:37] Uncle John: She was so afraid that she was gonna get a spanking, and I just told her I was like, I’ll tell him it’s my fault, don’t worry about it. She’s like, what? I was like, yep, I did it. And so when my parents came home, I just told them I broke the window.
Oh! I didn’t really care, it didn’t bother me that much. Yeah. But I got in trouble for everything anyway, so. One more thing [00:30:00] isn’t going to do anything to me. Yeah, probably after that, um, it changed a little bit. I think.
Okay, At least that’s when I noticed it, I should say.
[00:30:14] Khamya: Yeah. Um, was, hold on, let me think about this.
Um, um,
did you have like a, did you have like a close relationship with your parents?
[00:30:37] Uncle John: With my mom?
[00:30:38] Khamya: Yeah. Yeah.
[00:30:42] Uncle John: Um, close in a Korean sense.
[00:30:46] Khamya: Mm-hmm . Um.
[00:30:49] Uncle John: Yeah, it’s just my mom.
[00:30:50] Khamya: Yeah, I know. My mom has told me certain things with, um, grandpa, so I know [00:31:00] how I, well, I’ve heard, I’ve never seen it before, but I’ve heard things about him.
[00:31:09] Uncle John: Yeah. It was probably just because he drank a lot smoking, like,
[00:31:12] Khamya: yeah. Yeah.
[00:31:15] Uncle John: My mom, she did smoke and then I think she found out that somebody was taking some of her cigarettes. That someone just happened to be me at the time. She never caught me, but I think she realized that she had cigarettes missing. And she just quit cold turkey that day.
[00:31:43] Khamya: Oh, wow,
[00:31:44] Uncle John: I’ve never seen my mom smoke again.
[00:31:47] Khamya: Oh, wow
[00:31:49] Uncle John: Yeah, she just stopped.
[00:31:51] Khamya: Oh good for her. That’s crazy. She went cold turkey, but
[00:31:56] Uncle John: Yeah [00:32:00] yeah, that was it we don’t really talk about family or early life or nothing like that Honestly, I don’t think it’s something that most Asian or Korean families do.
[00:32:19] Khamya: Mm hmm. Yeah, I definitely can agree to that.
[00:32:31] Uncle John: Sometimes I guess we do, but it’s just not a normal thing.
[00:32:34] Khamya: Yeah.
[00:32:38] Uncle John: It’s not the stuff you see on TV. No,
[00:32:41] Khamya: yeah, it’s not. The stuff they show on TV is not real. They don’t, that’s not how it is. No. Literally watching a TV show right now. Well, not literally right now, but like currently like watching it.
And like the daughter tells her mom quite literally [00:33:00] everything. And I’m like, If I told my mom that kind of stuff, I’d get a whooping . Like I would get a whooping. Oh man.
[00:33:13] Uncle John: Yeah. Yeah. That’s probably when I, in my opinion mm-hmm .
[00:33:22] Khamya: Yeah. Um, uh, do you have like a, do you have a favorite memory, like. Of like anything, like what’s your like, do you have like a favorite memory of like, you know, either you and like the Marines or like growing up or like, like in your like, just anytime, like your all time favorite memory.
[00:33:55] Uncle John: There’s a couple I think that are kind of funny, I guess. [00:34:00] Like, when we flew back to the States.
[00:34:06] Khamya: Mm hmm.
[00:34:14] Uncle John: Apparently when the plane landed in North Carolina, I ran off the plane and started running around in the tarmac and people had to chase me.
[00:34:29] Khamya: I’m weak.
[00:34:31] Uncle John: I remember, I remember the first time I stole something, I was five, eight count box of crayons on the floor and we were walking back to the car. And I was with my dad, and he saw me pull these box of crayons out of my pocket.
He’s like, where’d you get those box of crayons from? I said, from the store. And so he walked me back to the store, [00:35:00] and he made me give them back to the cashier lady.
And then he said, which hand did you take it with? I was like, I don’t know. I said, this one, this one, this one, this one. I was putting both of my hands out, back and forth. Until he smacked them both.
[00:35:17] Khamya: Oh! That’s funny.
[00:35:22] Uncle John: I remember another time, my mom, she used to trick me with food. Um, so I was helping, we were like latchkey kids, so I was babysitting, all that kind of stuff from a young age.
Okay. All right. So last weekend. So, um, I was doing things around the house, you know, cooking, uh, watching my sisters, all that kind of stuff. Probably when I was like eight, seven, eight, something like that. Um, and older. Cutting the grass [00:36:00] a little bit more. Anyways, I remember one time that was kind of funny afterwards, not at the time, but it was like, I don’t know, seven 30 in the morning or something and it just came up.
And my mom came into the room and she was like, Hey, I cooked some, I cooked some food. I got ribs and stuff like that. You want some food? Mm hmm. And I was like, Heck yeah, I want some food. So I got up and I went to the kitchen. I was looking so forward to the food. Mm hmm. I said, looking around, I don’t see anything. And I asked my mom, I was like, Mom, where’s the food? And she just didn’t even look at me. She was cutting up some potatoes or something. And she was like, go cut the grass.
[00:36:46] Khamya: Oh, that is funny.
[00:36:49] Uncle John: Like she would like trick me to do things every now and again or mess with me to do things every now and again. Yeah. , that was one of the first times when that’s, that’s kinda one of the ones that I remember [00:37:00] most, I guess. Mm-hmm . That’s
[00:37:03] Khamya: Oh, grandma .
[00:37:06] Uncle John: Yeah. She always do stuff like that.
[00:37:08] Khamya: She’s a trip . She is hilarious. Oh man. Didn’t you guys, um, didn’t you have pets? Like dog, like a dog, or?
[00:37:24] Uncle John: Um, yeah, so we had two dogs. So I actually, actually tried to bring a snake home one time. My mom freaked out. And she told me to go throw it back outside. So I went to go throw it back outside. Um, and then I brought a dog home one day. The guy was giving away dogs. A pointer hunting dog. Oh. And I brought it home. Like five or six days later. So it’s too late for me to go back out and they [00:38:00] were mad, but they just let me keep the dog and I had to take care of it. So we had that dog for a couple of years. And so we moved from North Carolina to Oklahoma. And when we moved, we had to get rid of the dog. So I actually gave the dog to my uncle who had a farm. And later on after that. My parents wanted to get a dog. It was a toy poodle.
[00:38:38] Khamya: Oh yes, I’ve heard about this toy poodle.
[00:38:42] Uncle John: Yeah, so that’s a toy poodle. We had that dog, her name was Speedy. Probably like seven or eight pounds. We had that dog forever. That dog was kind of funny. There was one time when [00:39:00] his mom was sitting on the floor eating. And she was sitting cross legged on the floor in his doll. Eating cereal or something, watching cartoons, and Speedy came onto your mom’s knee. I was watching your mom eat, and your mom was eating like a cow, her mouth open. And Speedy was trying to time it, and try to grab food out of your mom’s mouth when she opened it. And your mom bit down on her tongue. So your mom knew that Speedy was there, but she didn’t know what she was trying to do. Mhm. And your mom was Chewing like a cow, Speedy stuck her tongue out to try and get food real fast. Mm hmm. And her thumb chomped down on Speedy’s [00:40:00] tongue, and then the dog yelped. Oh! I’m like, what’d you do to the dog? She’s like, I don’t know! And then we sat there and kind of figured it out. She was trying to eat food out of your mouth. Did you eat with your mouth open? I’m
[00:40:15] Khamya: That is funny! Oh, I’m definitely bringing that up.
[00:40:19] Uncle John: Yeah, you bring it up, she’ll remember that.
[00:40:24] Khamya: She’s gonna be like, who told you? Ha ha ha ha ha. Oh, Moeka.
[00:40:30] Uncle John: Yeah, but that was it. We had a turtle once. It was a turtle that just popped from the lake. Aw. It wouldn’t eat for that long. My sisters had two birds, two parakeets. Those parakeets ended up killing each other. One killed another parakeet and then they replaced that parakeet and that parakeet got killed by the same parakeet again. And so
[00:40:57] Khamya: Auntie Joy?
[00:40:58] Uncle John: Yep. No more birds after that. [00:41:00] Yep.
[00:41:00] Khamya: Oh! Oh wow.
[00:41:04] Uncle John: Yep. That was it. That was pretty much all the pets we had. My mom didn’t like pets. Yeah. Yeah. Aw.
[00:41:17] Khamya: Aw. Yeah. Let’s see. Well, we actually managed to answer all my questions, actually.
[00:41:28] Uncle John: Okay, well that’s good.
[00:41:29] Khamya: Yeah, that was, it was like you were answering like five at a time.
[00:41:37] Uncle John: Well, you know, I’m kind of gifted that way. Mm-hmm . Just that overachieve. Yes, yeah. If you need anything else for the school project or whoever, just lemme know.
[00:41:54] Khamya: Yes, I definitely will. Thank you. Thank you for the help. [00:42:00] I gotta, um,
[00:42:01] Uncle John: You’re welcome.
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