Mrs. Chely Diaz

Chely Diaz, my mother’s friend was the first person I thought about for this interviewing project. I thought, why not choose the one person my mother constantly talks about when we are on the topic of immigrants. I did know about parts of Chely Diaz’s life from stories my mother has told me briefly as I’ve grown up, but never to the extent like in this interview on November 28th of 2021. My mom would often bring up Mrs. Diaz’s life stories as I grew up to inform me of an example of how it is to live as in immigrant here in the U.S.

A droone photo from Cerro Juana Lainez with Honduras flag and the city of Tegucigalpa

Mrs. Diaz is a Honduran woman who came to the U.S. at a very young age, 18 to be exact. Although she was an adult by legal terms, she was still very young. She talks about many obstacles she has faced in the departure of her homeland and her arrival to the U.S. One obstacle being how she basically had no help, socially and economically, to come to the U.S. from Honduras. She tells me many difficulties she has faced and continues to face here in the U.S. Some of these struggles have been on a day-to-day basis or something that has been very traumatizing such as almost being raped on her way to cross the Mexico-U.S. border through the Rio Grande. Some of these things we have talked in this interview were things my parents have told me briefly because they want me to know that immigrants face obstacles that others in the U.S. do not face. Although the U.S. is country where it says it’s a haven for those wanting to prosper or obtain the “American Dream,” it isn’t as easy as it sounds. For example, Mrs. Diaz has been living in the U.S. for at least 20 years and is still undocumented. This hasn’t been a problem when integrating to this country’s customs, but she still has her homeland customs. I felt like I could live in her footsteps the way the interview went. Although I have my own experience since both my parents are also immigrants, I felt I got to see another view I haven’t see yet. I felt as if I got a very micro level of what it is to be an immigrant in the U.S. from Mrs. Diaz’s interview. This micro-level experienced has helped me understand some things in our own class such as how some things are very micro but are part of something greater. Mrs. Diaz often says in her responses that others can feel this or something too, that they probably have experienced it too. I really admired that she could connect to others like herself and that sometimes others like her don’t feel the same. I felt really close to Mrs. Díaz story as I have seen it myself with other immigrants and my family. Many of the things we talk about in the interview is something I thought back to sociology, more specifically in this class of sociology of immigration.

While I was interviewing Mrs. Diaz and even after the interview itself, I only thought about how her life story and feelings can be connected to something greater. I often do this in general, but because of my time here at James Madison University I have taken multiple classes that have been embedded the notion to look at things from a greater perspective. My two sociology lectures have helped with this. They have helped me see what some patterns are can be Mrs. Diaz tells me that is something others feel, especially those who are immigrants. I think that’s the whole point of this interview project, to connect one person to others and see how we are not so different after all. Many things Mrs. Diaz’s and I talked about were things we connected to back in our lectures like low paying jobs, the connections to coming here, the aftermaths of 9/11, and much more that are or were affecting the lives of immigrants. Here I will be talking about how Mrs. Diaz’s life is connected to something bigger, which is immigration here in the U.S.

Departure and Arrival

To get started, Mrs. Diaz informs us left Honduras, where she had a baby and her family, to the U.S. at a young age, but she did so because she feared the threats she was receiving from her previous partner. Whom she broke up with after finding out he had another partner. She says she has reasons, two, for why she left:

I was a very early teenage mother. I had a partner at a young age, let’s say, adolescence, I got pregnant. Then and the person who was my partner lied to me, he told me that he was single. After that, his current partner and his family threatened me very, very much. I had the decision to come because on many occasions, one time they tried to throw my daughter into the street to be killed by a car …The other [reason why I came] was because I also wanted to help my parents, who were, well, they were poor, let’s say that for the reason. The main one was to escape, out of fear.

She was escaping Honduras because harmful threats, but to also help her family. These reasons are very similar reasons why others like Mrs. Diaz choose to leave their homeland to come to the U.S. In class, we went over some theories on why people come to the U.S. first place. Some may be because of work, education, a better life, asylum/refugee, or simply other reasons. One big thing I have seen in Mrs. Diaz’s story and one she states herself, is that she is seeking a better life but also a safer place. We can see on her reasons why she decided to come to the U.S. is because she is experiencing the push-pull aspect of the migration theory. She is being pushed out of her country to another because her life is in danger from her former partner and his threats against her and their child’s safety. I think about a part later in the interview when she said something about coming to the U.S. saying, “It is not that one wants to come [to the U.S.] because of- because one wants to, but sometimes life circumstances force you to come”. I believe this sentence is a key to understanding why many immigrants come. Sometimes it’s not about the pull factors like the U.S. rags to riches story, but sometimes it’s just about needing to leave because life is making it too difficult to stay. The pull factor was that shown in this interview was she saw the U.S. like how many other see the U.S. as a haven for those who need a home after being pushed out. They see the U.S. as a place how Mrs. Diaz says, a place to overcome. Many immigrants like Mrs. Diaz, were pulled into this image of the U.S. for their reason of why they migrated here:

Lady Liberty amongst the clouds

For example, the first to overcome, because in my country it’s something that you will never have. The overcoming. One because there are no jobs, they don’t give you the opportunity and here it’s a country where if you propose what you want, you can achieve it. So, all that gave me, me, gave me the courage to come.

Of course, there are many pulls like economically better chances for one to prosper, but I believe that is a key reason in the overcoming aspect in Mrs. Diaz’s story. She wanted to overcome and do more, but her country cannot do that for her but the U.S can. Although Mrs. Diaz’s had her own reasons to leave, we are also informed that it was not an easy thing to do. As I look back in our class, we were informed that many people die coming to the U.S. That many bodies have been found just coming here, so many immigrants coming here make a cost-benefit analysis of coming to the U.S. before they decide to come. Even still, Mrs. Diaz made the very dangerous trip from her homeland in Honduras all the way to Houston, Texas. When I asked her about her trip here, she said it was relatively easy since it was an earlier age in U.S. immigration policy making. The trip itself was difficult because she states many times, she had no one and had to rely on the people to help guide her to the U.S:

You have to go hungry. Sometimes you have to ask people for help. Sometimes they don’t want to help you because they don’t know you and I think it would be the hardest thing to do alone …Sometimes they don’t want to support you and I understand them because it is not, it is not an obligation and it is not their right either. And yes, it is very hard, but that is something that all of us take the risk, you understand me, to seek a better future.

As we learned in class, in discussion boards, and even extra credit documentaries, we see how that many immigrants can face these difficulties coming to the U.S. I remember in a discussion board, we had to watch a Netflix documentary about immigrants and I continued watching it after the assignment and they did talk about their journey and how it wasn’t that easy. I remember and relate it back to Mrs. Diaz story on how she had to go around asking for help in hope someone will help because all she wanted was to come get a better future. I think what really stuck with me in her departure journey was the fact that she was almost raped. It was something very hard for her which I understand completely. It must’ve been a traumatic experience, something that other immigrants may even face. I remember in one of our discussion boards we were told to listen to this hour to 2-hour podcast about immigrants under the Trump Administration and a new immigrant law he created that made immigration much more difficult for those coming to the U.S. and trying to seek refugee or asylum. What I remember vividly from that podcast was the fact that many immigrants would tell the interviewer that they needed refugee or asylum to the U.S. and that they could no longer stay in their country nor Mexico because they would be gang raped, raped, killed, harassed, and worse in both Mexico and in their country. The number of times I heard rape and something similar was breath-taking. It only reminded me of Mrs. Diaz story as she mentions how she was almost raped on her way here. She may have not been fortunate, but many others do not have the same luck as she does.

            Once arriving to the U.S., she tells us that she was caught immediately by immigration officers:

When I came to the United States, when I, well, when this person tried to rape me. Well, obviously, migration was coming. They detained me, they told me they were going to put me in jail because at that time I was already eighteen years old …So, they kept me there for like three hours. I had a brother here in Virginia who was a citizen …So, they called him and, and he didn’t answer. So, they had me there about four hours later, they released me and told me to go wherever I wanted.

As she tells us her first arrival here, we see how easy it was compared to now in days on the news. It was as if back then they caught immigrants coming as if they were people who publicly drink then let them go after they have calmed down. That’s something we will probably never see now in days because our immigration system has been radically changed for various reasons after this time. Now in days you will see or hear on the news that they are being kept in cages, camps, or detention centers for months on end until they can get deported back.

Being in America

Mrs. Diaz had a handful of stories to tell from her time in the U.S. and how her integration went on as she spent the next 20 yeas living here. She explains that she did face many social, economic, and cultural differences when she got here and tried to integrate herself while trying to obtain the “American Dream”. Although she has been here for 20 years, she still faces some of these obstacles but not as much because time has helped with some things, but not others. Mrs. Diaz made her journey from Honduras to the U.S. in the year 2002, a year after the 9/11 attack. When asked about how it got hard, she says it was easy but got harder because of 9/11:

I think the migration process has been difficult for years, but I think that it became more difficult since the Twin Towers happened, it was like, it was easier. You could come, you could get sponsored by a boss, they gave you a document. Since that happened, I think that for the Latino immigrant race I think it has been the worst since they have focused more on us.

USA Green Card or permanent resident card and employment authorization card

This is a clear example of how the 9/11 tragic attacks have affected many immigrants globally who were coming to the U.S. As we know from our policy presentations and our lectures about the U.S. immigration system has also been at play but not to the extent it is now. We know that they first started excluding those who were Chinese and later those who were from Asian descent based on keeping the U.S. homogenous and so they wouldn’t take “American jobs”. As time has progressed, the immigration system of the U.S. has been constantly excluding a certain group of people from coming to the U.S. We also know this because quotas that have been set on many countries that the U.S. only allowed for a certain amount of those citizens to come and be in the U.S. Getting to the more recent years, the 9/11 attacks have caused a whole change in the immigration system that have affected many immigrants today in settings like jobs. She says in her interview that thing was easier, but after 9/11 things got increasing more difficult:

In those days it was like it was easier to find a job, it was not as difficult as in other times. At first, like any immigrant, it does not cost you a lot, because no, one does not have your legal documents, another does not know the language. So, I think that here you do the job – whatever job they offer you for you is good. 

It was easier then, but not so easy now. You can say it was a bit of a whole reform to protect the American people form another tragic attack like that. Although this was 20 years ago, it has huge effects on those in the U.S. now, such as those trying to be citizens like Mrs. Diaz:

US flag and citizenship and immigration paperwork

I keep hoping that one day my dream will come true, and I can say that I have or maybe not citizenship, but a permit that tells you I am legal, here I am fine because unfortunately, I have not been able to. I’m almost 20 years old in this country and unfortunately, I don’t have a legal status.

Although Mrs. Diaz doesn’t explicitly say that she was affected by the actions taken by the U.S. after 9/11 to get legal status, it’s shown in how she is still here after the attacks and still being undocumented. Mrs. Diaz is like many of those undocumented here in the U.S. who still want for a better chance to get or obtain citizenship. Sometimes this is part of the American Dream, like Mrs. Diaz dream of “have your own house and be legal in this country”. But because of previous administrations and actions of others, the policies have become much harder than it was in 2002, thus making the American dream more difficult for some.

            Laws and history aren’t the only thing that came with integration in the new U.S. lifestyle for Mrs. Diaz. She says that integrating was difficult because “One … you do not know the language and many people when you do not know their language reject you”. We see how her not knowing the language affected socially because they get “rejected”. I see how this connects back to the contexts of reception in class because this can be a bigger feeling many other immigrants have and someone or someplace decides to start helping those immigrants not feel left out. A great example of this is when Mrs. Diaz later brought up that she had a church that would teach adults English on Tuesdays and Thursdays. Some other things came up easier than she thought like the cultural aspect of integration:

But you also try to integrate into the way of life because you want to or not, you live in a country that is not yours. So, you try to get customs that have not existed in your country and that for you is new, but you try to get used to or adapt the customs of this country.

She later explains that with time, it was easier for her to adapt. This was also due to her having a family here, where she had kids who would American born and learned the culture themselves either in school or at home. Finally getting into the American experience, I asked if she had felt Americans and she responds with “Well, I don’t really feel American, because I think even if I did, I wouldn’t feel American… Because sometimes you get so used to this country, you get so used to it that suddenly sometimes you feel and sometimes you don’t”. We touch on this in the lecture about generations because we know there are many generations. This shows the part of lecture in which many immigrants feel stuck in between to places, the first generation still haves those ties to their homeland country while being in another country.

Conclusion

            As much as I can write about Mrs. Diaz, her life was very interesting to find myself connect to this class and to a bigger picture. I wish I had asked her more about her childhood and more about growing up here. I did have a great pleasure of learning another perspective of the immigrant life from someone close. Although Mrs. Diaz has a unique story, we can see how she has many patterns that connects her with other immigrants all over the U.S. I think that will be the beauty to see in this interview project, just how similar many immigrants are and what makes them different.

Ashley Machado: [00:00:00] Hi. My name is Ashley Machado Rivera. I will be here interviewing Chely Diaz. This recording will be in Spanish. Please state your name and your country of origin.

Chely Diaz: [00:00:13] Hi, my name is Chely Diaz. My hometown is Honduras.

Ashley Machado: [00:00:18] In what year did you come?

Chely Diaz: [00:00:20] 2002 

Ashley Machado: [00:00:20] Ok. How did you come from Honduras to the United States? 

Chely Diaz: [00:00:28] I crossed the Salvador- sorry Guatemala border, then the border from Mexico. 

Ashley Machado: [00:00:35] Did you have assistance to come here?

Chely Diaz: [00:00:38] No.

Ashley Machado: [00:00:38] How? Did you come alone?

Chely Diaz: [00:00:40] I came alone. 

Ashley Machado: [00:00:42] Ah, ok. Do you have reasons why you came here? Or something that the United States had that you didn’t want to be in Honduras? 

Chely Diaz: [00:00:53] Well, the first reason was, I think the most important. I was a very early teenage mother. I had a partner at a young age, let’s say, adolescence, I got pregnant. Then and the person who was my partner lied to me, he told me that he was single. After that, his current partner and his family threatened me very, very much. I had the decision to come because on many occasions, one time they tried to throw my daughter into the street to be killed by a car. And after that, with the shape of time, I was 16 years old, at that time I was 14 years old. Later I found another partner, but the threats remained the same for me. So, I made the decision to immigrate to this country, one to save my life. The other was because I also wanted to help my parents, who were, well, they were poor, let’s say that for the reason. The main one was to escape, out of fear. 

Ashley Machado: [00:02:14] Wow. You say you came alone, how could you, did you have to pay something to come alone or did you have help to come here? 

Chely Diaz: [00:02:28] No. I came alone at the time I came back in 2002. It was a little easier, let’s say, because it wasn’t as much as it is today. At that time, you asked someone to help you travel by car from one place to another and asking or asking. I was able to get there. Later, there were some people who belonged to me, to my place, but they had come to Mexico for a long time and I asked them for refuge so that I could advance as I went to the goal that was to reach the United States.

Ashley Machado: [00:03:13] It was difficult your journey here when you were, in other words, coming alone. 

Chely Diaz: [00:03:20] Yes, very difficult.

Ashley Machado: [00:03:22] What experiences do you remember that were the hardest parts? 

Chely Diaz: [00:03:27] Well, the difficult ones that you don’t know about. You have to go hungry. Sometimes you have to ask people for help. Sometimes they don’t want to help you because they don’t know you and I think it would be the hardest thing to do alone. Ask people to help you and people don’t want to help you even if you are of the same race as yours. Sometimes they don’t want to support you and I understand them because it is not, it is not an obligation and it is not their right either. And yes, it is very hard, but that is something that all of us take the risk, you understand me, to seek a better future.

Ashley Machado: [00:04:12] Are there other things that the United States had that Honduras didn’t have for you?

Chely Diaz: [00:04:19] Yes, a lot. For example, the first to overcome, because in my country it’s something that you will never have. The overcoming. One because there are no jobs, they don’t give you the opportunity and here it’s a country where if you propose what you want, you can achieve it. So, all that gave me, me, gave me the courage to come.

Ashley Machado: [00:04:54] Speaking of your experience and migrating here, were you somewhat afraid when you arrived here?

Chely Diaz: [00:05:05] A, I was a little scared because sometimes you without knowing anyone, you just go out. But you don’t know what you’re going to come here for. When I got to the United States border, there are people who cross you, right? So, before I came, of course, I saved money like everyone else. There are people who cross you, ask for little money, and cross you. When I got to the border, I really don’t remember the name it was. When that person crossed me. I think it was the most difficult experience and the one that one never forgot, right? When this person crosses the Rio Grande for me, what everyone says. This person wanted to abuse me and then I was afraid because you don’t know other people, right? And you won’t like that like you ask and beg that they don’t. Thank God he didn’t, he didn’t do anything to me. Thank God because. But I begged him, begged him, knelt down, not to do anything to me because I was pregnant. True, when I came, when I came, I had another partner from the one I currently have that I had already stated. But I made the decision to come, because of what I had already mentioned, because of the threats from the current partner I had- from the other partner I had, and from their relatives. When I came, I didn’t know that I was pregnanr from my my partner, but even so, let’s say, I came to realize that, more or less, I thought I was pregnant. But still, I made the decision to come. When I cross the river, this person tries to rape me. I begged him, I knelt down, not to do it, that I was pregnant. He told me that he didn’t care that he was going to do it anyway. Thank God he couldn’t. No, he did not do it because precisely at that moment the migration boat was coming, and then he left me and left. And for that reason, I think I was saved practically that he did not abuse me.

Ashley Machado: [00:07:27] How much did you pay him?

Chely Diaz: [00:07:30] At that time, he charged me like a hundred dollars, nothing more.

Ashley Machado: [00:07:38] Wow, that’s a little money. Did you have assistance to help you, why do you pay this man who helped you cross?

Chely Diaz: [00:07:44] No, because like there when you go there are a lot of people, a lot of people who tell you, pay me so much, I’ll cross you. So, it’s practically on that, on that border. You know a lot of people. Let’s say not that you know them, but there are many people who already know what you are going for.

Ashley Machado: [00:08:06] Wow. What happened when you arrived here in the United States and where did you arrive?

Chely Diaz: [00:08:11] When I came to the United States, when I, well, when this person tried to rape me. Well, obviously, migration was coming. They detained me, they told me they were going to put me in jail because at that time I was already eighteen years old. I was scared, nervous, I couldn’t even find what to say, my body was shaking, my hands were shaking, everything was shaking. When they took me to declare everything, where I was from and everything, I couldn’t speak out of fear. So, at that moment, I fainted and after I fainted, I wondered why I had fainted. I told him I was pregnant. They did a pregnancy test to see if it was true and it came out positive, that I was pregnant. So, they kept me there for like three hours. I had a brother here in Virginia who was a citizen. They called him and I did not know my brother because practically he had come to the United States since, since he was very young and he hardly visited my country or anything like that. So, I practically brought his phone with me because of any emergency. So, they called him and, and he didn’t answer. So, they had me there about four hours later, they released me and told me to go wherever I wanted. At that time, I did not know where to turn because I did not know anything. So, what I did was go down the street and stop the cars, the car that wanted to help me. I remember that one person approached me and said, “Did migration grab you?” He told me. I said “Yes”. So, I said to myself “Where are you going?” And I said, “I don’t know where I’m going.” Then he told me “I have, I go to work.” He told me “If you want, I can ask my boss if I can help you because I feel sorry for you.” He told me “That you are here in the street alone, you don’t know anyone”. And I said “Okay”. Then he asked the boss about it and his boss said that it was all good. He had me at his house for about a week, while my brother answered me and to see if he wanted to help me. Then I asked my brother if he could help me. They told me that they could help me only to bring me to this state, but there is practically no help financially.

Ashley Machado: [00:10:59] What state did you get in when you’re here?

Chely Diaz: [00:11:04] I came to Houston and after Houston, I came here, to Virginia.

Ashley Machado: [00:11:15] How can you describe the experience living here in the United States that week with those people helping you.

Chely Diaz: [00:11:23] Well, it’s really hard because you don’t know people, but suddenly it’s hard because you don’t know. But sometimes people on the road and people who are good-hearted and do it to help you. And the truth is that I cannot complain. They helped me and I am very grateful for that.

Ashley Machado: [00:11:53] Do you still have communications with these people?

Chely Diaz: [00:11:56] I don’t even remember his face, because that happened years ago. The truth is that I do not remember theirs, because neither they cannot help you to offer help to help you feed yourself. But they will never give you a communication phone number because they don’t want to get into trouble either. I think that just as they do it with one, they can do it with anyone. But no, unfortunately, I don’t have communication, I don’t know who they were. It was a person, but I don’t know his last name, his first name, nothing. But I am grateful of them.

Ashley Machado: [00:12:35] Already arriving here in Virginia, where we are living right now, your life is the same for 20 years. How can you distribute the experience of living the same as an immigrant still? 

Chely Diaz: [00:12:52] Well, the experience that I can say is that it has changed a lot. Let’s say, when I first came here to Virginia, well, I came to my family, he had me for a while, I helped me for a while after that time, because I decided to move elsewhere, to look for a job. In those days it was like it was easier to find a job, it was not as difficult as in other times. At first, like any immigrant, it does not cost you a lot, because no, one does not have your legal documents, another does not know the language. So, I think that here you do the job – whatever job they offer you for you is good. 

Ashley Machado: [00:13:47] What job did you guarantee- what was the first job you got coming here?

Chely Diaz: [00:13:56] Well, the first job I worked at was cleaning houses. I worked, I worked for many years cleaning houses, let’s say with different people. Suddenly I was working, well for a year like one, but practically the work was the same, always cleaning because it is something that sometimes they do not ask for documents. No, you don’t have to speak a language. So, I worked a long, long-time cleaning.

Ashley Machado: [00:14:33] How did you have those connections with those people who cleaned houses?

Chely Diaz: [00:14:40] Well sometimes if you go to the laundromat, the laundromat and they put up ads like they rent rooms, babysit, need people to work and just like that I had them. 

Ashley Machado: [00:15:01] Economically, it was difficult to integrate here in the United States. 

Chely Diaz: [00:15:08] Financially?

Ashley Machado: [00:15:09] Yes, the same as in your whole life living here.

Chely Diaz: [00:15:15] Well, the truth was that financially it was very difficult. I had to face many things because as I told you, I came pregnant after my daughter was born a few months later and I had to fight. Sometimes I couldn’t even say to buy her a box of bread or a box of wipes. It was, it was difficult because you felt like you only understood me because it felt like either I don’t have a family and I don’t have anything. And if I, have it, it’s not like I had it because it wasn’t support you had 100 percent, let’s say, not even 50 percent. So, it was very difficult because you had to face a lot of things. There were times when I worked and could only afford the rent and my food. And sometimes according to the time in this country you meet people, right? Then you make friends or acquaintances and suddenly you have to ask those people for help. Can you lend me or give me even 50 dollars to buy a box of bread, for a box of wipes? It is difficult, it is very hard, let’s say, the one that you have to live, do you understand me? Because here is not that you are going to come, you are going to have your children and they are going to donate help here. Mainly it has cost me too much.

Ashley Machado: [00:16:54] It was difficult to integrate into this American style, as many say. 

Chely Diaz: [00:17:01] It’s difficult. One, it is very difficult because you do not know the language, you do not know the language, and many people when you do not know the language reject you. Because the first thing they say, either go to school or leave my country, it’s not difficult. No no-no. I am not going to lie. On many occasions, I suffered too much discrimination and practically because of the language.

Ashley Machado: [00:17:31] What things did they tell you when you experienced similar discrimination because you didn’t speak English?

Chely Diaz: [00:17:41] There were a lot of people who said why did you come to this country if you don’t understand the language. Or, or they looked at you badly, or sometimes they make you like “you are an immigrant, you are Hispanic, go ahead, get out of this country. Learn the language. Here we are in the United States. English is spoken in the United States, Spanish is not spoken”. So many times, if it hurts, you understand me, that they tell you that, because it is not that one wants to come because of- because one wants to, but sometimes life circumstances force you to come. Well, you come or die in your country, then you decide to come. But no, no, you don’t come to steal anything from anyone. You come to work. Of course, it hurts not knowing the language because everyone wants, you understand me, to learn the language well. But sometimes we Hispanics have the majority, we come to work, we don’t have time to go to school, study. Why? Because we come to work. So sometimes you feel like you say, I would like to learn it, but I don’t have the time to learn it, why? Because you have so many things to do that it focuses more on your work than going to school.

Ashley Machado: [00:19:03] Did you have the opportunity to go to school to learn English?

Chely Diaz: [00:19:08] I had the opportunity, let’s say because there are churches that help you, that you can go twice a week to learn English, which is practically free. So, I went or for several years I went to a church that helped you on Tuesdays and on Thursdays they gave you classes from 7 at night, 9 at night. So, little by little I was going, I was learning, do you understand me? Because everyone wants to know, not perfect, but to defend yourself.

Ashley Machado: [00:19:46] Did you learn a lot when you went there?

Chely Diaz: [00:19:49] Yes, I learned a lot because I put, I put interest in the classes because I wanted to improve myself. I wanted, at least, that when someone spoke to me, maybe not to speak it perfectly, but to understand or answer what they wanted to tell me, or what I wanted to answer.

Ashley Machado: [00:20:13] I wanted to ask about some work. It was difficult to get used to all the same, demands here in the United States, how do you have to work or 40 hours or more?

Chely Diaz: [00:20:30] You don’t understand the question, sorry.

Ashley Machado: [00:20:34] It was difficult getting used to the United States demand in working certain hours?

Chely Diaz: [00:20:42] Hmm, I really don’t think it was difficult because like I told you before, I work as a cleaner. Cleaning has time to enter, but not to leave. Sometimes they can pick you up at seven, seven-thirty, but they never tell you you’re going to leave at three. I never have an exact time. If they are, you are going to work seven or eight hours. Never. In other words, then practically you get used to anything here in order to get ahead. You don’t care if you work ten hours, then you get used to it.

Ashley Machado: [00:21:18] Coming here to the United States, how did you feel about relationships with other people? Just like if you felt that they were very grateful that you were here or they did not like your presence here.

Chely Diaz: [00:21:34] Look, I think there are many things, there are many. As I told you, there are many times that you meet on the road, good people, good people and you do you find yourself, bad people, even if it is from you, from your own origin, even if they are sometimes Hispanic. Sometimes there are Hispanic people, but I had a lot of cleaning jobs, let’s say I worked and sometimes people because maybe the owner of the company is perhaps legal in the country, they speak a little more of the language, they want to humiliate you, they want you, that is, to pay what they want, why? Because the first thing they say or I give you a job, do you understand me? So, you have to put up with that and many times if I endured. I endured many humiliations of my own, of me. It hurts to say it, but sometimes from your own Hispanic people, sometimes you put up with a lot, as I said, sometimes when they speak the language or are legal, they believe much, much more than you. And they want to make you feel less, just because maybe you don’t speak the language or because you are not legal in this country.

Ashley Machado: [00:22:58] Do you think it was difficult to deliver – to enter, in this new culture, since coming here young or a little – a little bit of it?

Chely Diaz: [00:23:12] If it’s difficult for, one first that costs you the customs they have here. Mainly the language and it costs a lot to adapt. But you also try to integrate into the way of life because you want to or not, you live in a country that is not yours. So you try to get customs that have not existed in your country and that for you is new, but you try to get used to or adapt the customs of this country and I think that at first, it costs them all, but according to the years, it is like you get used to everything, to all cultures or to all the things that they are doing or those that are in this country.

Ashley Machado: [00:24:07] What customs were new to you when you were living here?

Chely Diaz: [00:24:12] Well, for me the last, the customs were like celebrating Thanksgiving. For me it was new, for example, celebrating Halloween. Halloween was never celebrated in my country, not even Thanksgiving Day. So, for me, that was new. Also, what they call Easter day is not celebrated in my country. There are many things that are not celebrated in your country, but when you come to this country and try to make a family here, you want your children to preserve the culture of this country because it is something that if you do not teach it at home, they are going to teach it to them at school anyway. So, it is good for the children to teach them both your cultures and the culture of the country that they are. So, it was difficult at the same time, but it is easy to get used to this country. You adapt like that very quickly to the cultures that they have.

Ashley Machado: [00:25:22] Do you think that time helped to adapt to all cultures?

Chely Diaz: [00:25:27] I think so. It helped me a lot in adaptation. In other words, as I said, everything costs, but if you come to a time that even you like the cultures that this country has.

Ashley Machado: [00:25:41] Speaking of cultures, what cultures do you have from Honduras that you put into your life and the lives of your children to preserve the Honduran culture?

Chely Diaz: [00:25:59] Well, the truth is that I’m hardly going to lie to you, I don’t want to be a liar about this. I have hardly had time to teach my children about cultures, have I? Because sometimes ah, but yes, for example, foods from my country teach them a lot. For example, in my country there are dances, right? In my country, which is a folk dance, there is the music, the music that we have, which is the music of the indigenous music, the music of the Garífuna, because in Honduras there are many people of color. So, we kind of always keep their culture alive, right? So, for example, their meals are always good, I try to teach her or this is the one food that the indigenous people make or another food that the Garífuna make. So, as I say, that is something that you want your children to understand where they come from. Because they have to know the origin of what is or the parents come from.

Ashley Machado: [00:27:27] Was it difficult for your children to get used to the Honduran culture then since they were born here?

Chely Diaz: [00:27:37] Well, when the children are a little young, they don’t like they don’t pay attention, maybe what your, your, let’s say your customs in your country because they practically they are born here. Their first language is English. So, like that when they are little like no, they don’t pay much attention. When they go big, this tries to tell them, look, this is culture, we do this, it tries to teach them videos. Try to involve them in some things that you say so that they know where you are from, where you came from. And they are like the ones, for example, the party that is my country makes that they are in September that the Independence Day of Honduras is celebrated on September 15th. So, I teach them what they do. For example, September 10 is Children’s Day. In my country, when they celebrate all the children, feed them and smash piñatas, it’s something I tell them, look at all this they do in my country. So, it’s like they later say oh, how nice what they do, like when they are older, they put a little interest in everything. Sometimes he says to one, look at this, these dresses are dresses that the indigenous people used, they used these. In other words, you try to make them understand what your customer is and what your culture is at the same time.

Ashley Machado: [00:29:18] Did they get used to the Honduran culture?

Chely Diaz: [00:29:22] Well, I think I was used to both cultures, so much so that even if you come to this country, you practically never stop, let’s say, carrying culture in your blood, or traditions or foods. So, I think that they, they do have something like that present in culture because practically one goes on saying it to them and I think so.

Ashley Machado: [00:29:58] Is there another hardship you have received here in the United States that, that you still find difficult?

Chely Diaz: [00:30:09] Well, the truth is, there are many difficulties, because, for example, I think this is never going to end. The difficulties from before, when I came, as I told you, it was very easy to get a job. You took one job to another; they didn’t give you anything. Now it is very difficult to get a job. Now they always tell you if you don’t have this, there is no job. So, I think that it is still difficult.

Ashley Machado: [00:30:46] Is there an experience with people who are citizens or immigrants or part of your community that made you feel – do you still remember and still stay with you?

Chely Diaz: [00:31:04] Yes, if I worked. I worked with one. After the years I met a friend who was a very good person. We put them to work in a company. I remember that once an American man was there and he told me this is what I am talking to the girl in Spanish and she yelled at me. He was the manna, forgiveness, the engineer, and he told me to shut up and stop speaking Spanish because it was a country where only English was spoken. And he told me If you are going to speak Spanish, you leave me for, for your country. And I said with all due respect, I respect you. Do you speak English? Perfect, I respect you. This country is supposed to be one of the laws and this country is one of many customs. Because here there are not only people who speak Spanish. There are many people who speak many languages. You are me, I told him, offending, discriminating just because I speak Spanish. I am speaking Spanish with her. When you speak to me in English, I answer you in English. I’m not speaking to you in Spanish at any time, I said. And I remember well that I told her when I talk to you, I speak English, and when I speak to her, I speak Spanish. You don’t have to bother because this country is free to express itself as you want. You are discriminating against me, I told him. And he told me this country speaks Spanish and if he did not tell me to leave, well I am leaving, but first I will report you to the office, I told him, because what you are doing to me is discrimination and that is not done. Why, I told him because this country is free to speak whatever you want? So, I did feel offended, I didn’t keep quiet because I was able to defend myself against this person in English. But sometimes I kind of like you discriminated against, do you understand me? For example, I have hardly ever left myself, let’s say I was offended in that way. Ah, thank God I learned a little English, I don’t know, perfect to speak, but I learned a little, it seems that it was to defend myself. I remember perfectly that I was in a shopping center, I was making a line to pay and there was another person behind me, a Hispanic. There was another person behind the Hispanic woman, who was people of color and wine. And just because the boy didn’t speak English, he started offending him and telling him everything. So, at that moment, sometimes, as I said, it is not you that they are doing it to you, therefore your people are doing it and sometimes you feel bad and you want to defend that person. Because many of us sometimes, perhaps because we do not know the language or because we are afraid, we remain silent, we just look down and remain silent. Maybe because you don’t have a problem with the police, because you know that if the police come, they will believe the other person because they will never believe you because first, they look at you because of your skin color or race, the more they will believe you. So many of us remain silent, but as I told you, I have tried to defend my right. Because whether you are from this country or not, I think that we have an obligation to defend ourselves. It is what it is, what I think, and what is fair.

Ashley Machado: [00:34:51] Do you still have difficulties or face difficulties like that or do you still look at people?

Chely Diaz: [00:34:59] I think this is never going to end. I think that because of your being Latina, people always look at you practically badly, they don’t tell you, but you in their gestures of people. Do you see that people just because they are Latino look at you badly or do people believe that because we are Latino will this person say that sometimes people have spoken with other people close to me, thinking that one does not understand, do they understand me? You feel bad. I do not answer them because they do not tell you directly, but they start talking, saying things, and if I have seen a lot of people how I tell you. The humiliation that they do to them, but as always, we remain silent due to fear, perhaps of not wanting to return them to your country. Because suddenly, well, you know, or if I get into a problem, the police came, they are going to arrest me, they are going to send me and many people need to be in this country, we need practically, right? So that’s why sometimes one is silent, but sometimes we do not have to be silent because we are in a country where it is assumed that we all have the right to freedom to express what we feel.

Ashley Machado: [00:36:28] Well, I wanted to ask what experiences you have with the environment here in the United States talking about politics.

Chely Diaz: [00:36:39] Well, about politics, the truth is, I hardly like to talk about politics much, because as they say, politics in all countries is the same. They always promise, promise, and never do anything. I think this politics will never change. And if there are people, there are presidents who have done good works for the Hispanic community, there are many presidents who have not loved them, they have discriminated against them, they have seen them as the worst. But as I almost told you about politics, I hardly like to talk a lot, because they promise, promise, and never fulfill.

Ashley Machado: [00:37:20] Do you think the people here have helped to make the immigration processes more difficult?

Chely Diaz: [00:37:33] I think the migration process has been difficult for years, but I think that it became more difficult since the Twin Towers happened, it was like it was a little easier. You could come, you could get sponsored by a boss, they gave you a document. Since that happened, I think that for the Latino immigrant race I think it has been the worst because they have focused more on us. It is what I think, they have focused more on the Latino race.

Ashley Machado: [00:38:12] And speaking of all that, I wanted to ask you if you received the squid- did you become a citizen here in the United States?

Chely Diaz: [00:38:24] Well, unfortunately, 20 years have passed and unfortunately, I’m still waiting. I keep hoping that one day my dream will come true and I can say that I have or maybe not citizenship, but a permit that tells you I am legal, here I am fine because unfortunately, I have not been able to. I’m almost 20 years old in this country and unfortunately, I don’t have a legal status.

Ashley Machado: [00:38:59] Not having any legal status, do you feel like you are an American here. Or as they all say.

Chely Diaz: [00:39:09] Well, I don’t really feel American, because I think even if I did, I wouldn’t feel American, let’s say. Ah, but it’s difficult, do you understand me? Not having them or one not feeling. Because sometimes you get so used to this country, you get so used to it that suddenly sometimes you feel and sometimes you don’t. This is like a limbo, wanting to feel you and at the same time you react, and you say I would like to feel me all the time, you accept your reality, and you know that you are not.

Ashley Machado: [00:39:53] And you laugh here to improve yourself. In other words, do you think you have come to get as all immigrants dream to have the American Dream?

Chely Diaz: [00:40:11] Could it be American Dream? I’m still really looking forward to it. Ah, I will not deny that I suffered too much my jobs, I suffered for a long time, I suffered humiliation with low salaries. But I’m going to tell you practically three years ago. It is not that I have fulfilled, as the American dream says, right? But I think that right now I am not fulfilling it, but as I am practically beginning to carry them out. Thank God I have a job, good job. I work for some American people who are people that God has put me in the way, they are people who do not care about your color, your race, your status, they do not care about anything. Simply what they value about you is your work. And let’s say that after practically 17 years living in this country, I have felt valued by those people because they are people who understand what your salary is. No, no, no, they are not like other people who say no to you, because you are here, I am going to pay you this, right? Blessed be God and I always, I always say it and I will always be grateful. I have not fulfilled it. I wish, I dreamed of fulfilling the American dream, I dream it. I ask God all the time to one day do it, but unfortunately, I have not done it at the moment. But I have faith in God, I have faith, a lot of faith in God that I am going to achieve it, that I am going to achieve it. As they say, everything comes slowly, all with the help of God and with the help of your work. Everything is slow and I will achieve it.

Ashley Machado: [00:42:17] What is the American dream for you?

Chely Diaz: [00:42:21] Well, I go through the American dream so, for everyone, let’s say you have your residence, have your own house and be legal in this country. I think that for me it is the American dream, and I will not be able to speak for other people because I do not know the thought of it, but for me, the American dream is to be, let’s say, a citizen of this country, to have my own home. That would be my dream, and I would say this is my American dream, the one that I wanted.

Ashley Machado: [00:43:04] Do you still have connections to your home country? Like how do you travel there, or do you have family there?

Chely Diaz: [00:43:17] You can travel as I told you before, almost 20 years after coming from my country. So, leaving my parents, my daughter. And then really since I came in 2002, I have not returned. And yes, I have communication with my sisters. I have two sisters in my country, I had four sisters. When I came, one died of cancer, the other, unfortunately, as I had mentioned before, in my country it is violent, they killed her, the gangs killed her, they killed her in the year it would be about 4 years, another four or five years ago. Unfortunately, they killed her leaving four children orphans. If I have a connection with my sisters, I talk to them, I help them from time to time. But traveling yes. I would like to travel, travel and let’s say not live there because it would be a liar if I told you that I wanted to return and not live because it is like reliving my past. It’s like, like reopening my past. It’s something that, my past was so ugly for me or maybe I have, I still have the same fear, maybe of going back and facing what I experienced. I am very afraid. Maybe that’s what I have left as it closes my head in wanting not to return, right? But at the same time, well, you know that you have more relatives there than you want. That’s one thing, other things than one and well, for me it’s hard, right? Because when I came, as I told my parents or my brothers, my daughter and unfortunately, I lost my parents, both. So, it was difficult to lose them because you know that you will never see him again and of course, you want at that moment that they tell you your father passed away, to run, catch a flight and leave for your country. But at the same time, you have children and then you are not between a rock and a hard place, what do you say if I leave, I will not return. I have my children here. What a future – if I came from my country because it is a country that does not give you opportunities, then you do not want to take your children or have the same thing happen to yours. So, with pain in your heart, you decide to bury your parents away for the same reason, for not wanting to return, so that your children do not suffer what you suffered. So, it’s hard, it’s hard, but at the same time, you feel like a daughter, at least as a daughter I feel good. Because how could I help them. And if there are many times that I have dreamed that I have returned, but when I dream of returning in my dreams, all I see are two graves and it is something that closes my mind, and right now as I say it, I do not cry because it is an interview truth? But it is something that scorches your heart, it makes your heart very small to see that you want to return and at the same time I do not want to return for perhaps not reliving things that have happened. So, but how are we like, as he says while the sword and the wall? I want to return to your country and at the same time stay in this country. You know it is not yours, but you have taken it as your country.

Ashley Machado: [00:47:47] Yes. Do you feel the same as a member of these equals of this community here in the United States?

Chely Diaz: [00:48:02] Well, I think so, because you adapt to customs, to many things and as the years go by, you try to get used to something that you know is not yours, right? But you try to get used to me. And sometimes I feel like in my heart I feel, I feel like I belong here because I have practically lived half my life in this country. Then there are moments that yes, sometimes you forget where they come from, right? And suddenly you feel but I’m not from here because I have to adapt to things. But I think that does not happen only to me. I think it happens to a lot of people like me.

Ashley Machado: [00:48:50] The final question is, do you have anything else you want to say that is part of immigration life that you didn’t feel we discussed?

Chely Diaz: [00:49:13] Oh well, I think what we didn’t discuss in this case was the healthcare system in this country. And as an experience of the health system, I’m going to tell you something. Well, here we are Hispanic, we don’t have many opportunities to have health insurance. Because we are an immigrant, we do not have fat health insurance, many times we have help, but it does not mean help that supports you 100 percent. Well, I’m going to tell you about me, about my case. Well, for many years I had stones in my gallbladder. I spent three years suffering from gallstones, suffering, and suffering. I would go to the hospital, they would come back to me and they would tell me no, that I had to go to the hospital or when – all they did was tell me they wouldn’t give me a pill and I would take it off. I remember that the last time I went to the hospital I could not bear it, I felt that I was dying and they did not want to treat me. I spent three hours in the hospital crying, lying on the floor because the truth was, I couldn’t stand it. I did not want to go to the hospital because I knew that whenever I went to the hospital, they never treated me and always for being because I was perhaps Latino. No, I didn’t pay much attention to you. I remember that time an American lady stood up and yelled at them and told them to take care of her, you are not seeing how she is suffering. So, when the lady stopped, they came and took me out of the emergency room and took me to a hospital corridor. In that corridor a nurse came, he gave me morphine. I remember that he made me so angry that when he put it on me, he bathed the wall with blood and put the needle in me and took it out and told me you can, you can go. I was like my God! I mean, he did it because the person yelled at him but if not, he would have let me die there. So, sometimes I don’t understand the health system in this country because you still go to the hospital, they send you the ticket, you pay for it. But sometimes many of us immigrants, let’s say, sometimes we endure the pains of no, of not wanting to go to a hospital because you know that they will not treat you. So, I think that this country does, sometimes it should change a little bit, let’s say, the health system. Another would be emigration, just like me. Not only me, many of the immigrant Latinos, some of us who are almost 20 years old, are almost here, some who have, but I have also met people who have lived here for 30 or 40 years. And they don’t give them the opportunity to come and say let’s talk about a document, we’re going to give them permission, work. You know that one with a work permit because there were many things. For example, in my case, I do not have a work permit. I do my taxes every year and every year to win a case, let’s say because I am not paid as a check to win a case. I pay a lot of money in taxes, every year I pay taxes, I don’t ask the government for it, I don’t take the government away, but even so, they put a lot of pretexts on them. Sometimes I think the laws of this country are unfair, for example, I have nothing against the people who come right now. I know that they all come for the same thing that I came, right? But sometimes you look at people who have just come and give them help and you say why, my God, I am so old. I come from home to work, I do the right things and I can’t have a document, I do taxes, I don’t steal from anyone, I don’t ask anyone. So, I think that if, if they were a little conscientious, they said we are going to give to the people that people really deserve, or the people that qualify or the people that they look at. But sometimes I think that sometimes life ends very unfair. For example, you come from work, home, not making any mistakes, and life seems to attack you the most. There are people that I have seen many Hispanic cases who are taking or stealing or doing many things and those people grab them, they give a document. So, I don’t understand the laws of this country. I would like to understand them, but I don’t understand them. I mean, you say I behave well, you are doing badly. I’m misbehaving, I’m leaving, I’m doing well. So, I think it is something that should be focused on people who have spent years paying their taxes and living in this country. So, I think that it is something that they should focus on first, putting mainly people who have been with us for many years. That’s what I think, in my opinion.

Ashley Machado: [00:55:05] You think that immigrant life here is gotten more difficult in these years, the same or not, living here in the United States and people coming.

Chely Diaz: [00:55:19] I think that if it lasts, I think it has gotten harder. Well, as I say, when I came all the time it has been hard. But I think about eight years ago, I would say, eight years ago. This has been harder, harder. I think that the laws have become much more mature for the immigrant.

Ashley Machado: [00:57:24] The last question is going to be. Yes. Do you think the United States is the same? It does not matter. In other words, your house now, since you came, is it from another country?

Chely Diaz: [00:57:46] Well, really for me the United States, my home. I really tell you from the heart, from the bottom of my heart, I tell you for me this is the country that gave me the opportunity that my country of origin did not give me. They were very hard days, many, many tears I cried, but it was a country that gave me help and how do I tell you. I love my country, I cannot deny it, but at the same time I did not want to do it, I did not want to. Is for me. This is my country and I feel a bit selfish in saying that, because really, I start to think this is not your country and sometimes, I cry and say you cannot focus on this country because it is not yours, because you were not born here. But for me, this is my country and I always say it, I am proudly proud because my children were born here, thank God they are American citizens. Other opportunities that I have never had, my country would never have obtained them and for me, I feel, I am proudly happy to be in this country.

Ashley Machado: [00:59:18] Okay, so that’s all the products I had. Thanks for your time and have a nice day.

Chely Diaz: [00:59:26] Thank you for interviewing me. It was a pleasure. Many thanks.

 

Ashley Machado [00:00:00] Hi. My name is Ashley Machado Rivera. I will be here interviewing Chely Diaz. This recording will be in Spanish. Por favor diga tu nombre y tu país de origen.

Chely Diaz [00:00:13] Hola, mi nombre es Chely Diaz. Mi ciudad natal es Honduras.

Ashley Machado [00:00:18] En qué año viniste?

Chely Diaz [00:00:20] 2002

Ashley Machado [00:00:20] Ok. Cómo veniste de Honduras a los Estados Unidos?

Chely Diaz [00:00:28] Crucé la frontera del Salvador- Perdón de Guatemala, luego la de México.

Ashley Machado [00:00:35] Tenías asistencia para venir aquí?

Chely Diaz [00:00:38] No

Ashley Machado [00:00:38] Como? Veniste sola?

Chely Diaz [00:00:40] Me vine sola.

Ashley Machado [00:00:42] Ah, ok. Tienes razones por qué viniste aquí? O algo que tenía los Estados Unidos que no querías estar en Honduras?

Chely Diaz [00:00:53] Bueno, la primera razón fue la creo que la más importante. Fui madre adolescente muy temprano. Tuve una pareja a mi corta edad, digamos así, de la adolescencia, salí embarazada. Luego las y la persona que era mi pareja, me mintió, me dijo que era soltero. Después de eso, su actual pareja de él y sus familiares me amenazaba mucho, mucho. Tuve la decisión de venirme porque en muchas ocasiones, una vez intentaron tirar a mi hija a la calle para que la matara un carro. Y después de eso, con el forma del tiempo, tenía yo 16 años, en ese tiempo tenía 14 años. Después yo encontré otra pareja, pero las amenazas seguían igual para mí. Entonces tomé la decisión de inmigrar a este país, una por salvar mi vida. La otra era porque también quería ayudar a mis padres, que eran, pues eran pobres, digamos así por la razón. La principal fue para escapar, por miedo.

Ashley Machado [00:02:14] Wow. Tu dices que viniste sola, como podías, tenías pagar algo para venir sola o tenías ayuda para venir aquí?

Chely Diaz [00:02:28] No. Vine sola en ese tiempo que me vine del 2002. Era un poco más fácil, digamos, porque como que no era tanto como los días de ahora. En ese tiempo tu pedías a alguien que te ayudara a viajar en carro de un lado a otro y preguntando o preguntando. Yo pude llegar. Después, habían unas personas que eran de mi, de mi lugar, pero se habían venido mucho tiempo para México y les pedí yo refugio para yo poder avanzar conforme iba yo a la meta que era llegar a Estados Unidos.

Ashley Machado [00:03:13] Era difícil tu viaje aquí cuando estabas, en otras palabras, viniendo sola.

Chely Diaz [00:03:20] Sí, muy difícil.

Ashley Machado [00:03:22] Qué experiencias recuerdas que eran las más partes difícil?

Chely Diaz [00:03:27] Bueno, las difíciles que tú no conoces. Tienes que aguantar hambre. A veces tiene que pedir ayuda a la gente. A veces no te quiere ayudar porque no te conocen. Y yo creo que sería lo más duro hacer sola, pedir a la gente que te ayude y la gente no te quiere ayudar aunque seas de la misma raza tuya. A veces no te quieren apoyar y los entiendo porque no es, no es obligación y tampoco no es el derecho de ellos. Y sí, es muy duro, pero eso es algo que todas las personas corremos el riesgo, me entiendes, para buscar un futuro mejor.

Ashley Machado [00:04:12] Hay otras cosas que tenía los Estados Unidos que Honduras no tenía para ti?

Chely Diaz [00:04:19] Sí, muchas. Por ejemplo, la primera en superación, porque mi país es algo que tú nunca lo vas a tener. La superación. Una porque no hay trabajos, no te dan la oportunidad. Y aquí es un país que si tú te propone lo que tú quieres, tú lo puedes lograr. Entonces todo eso me, me, me dio como que el coraje de venirme.

Ashley Machado [00:04:54] Hablando de tu experiencia y migrando aquí, tenías algo de miedo que cuando llegabas aquí?

Chely Diaz [00:05:05] A, si tenía un poco de miedo, porque a veces tú sin conocer a nadie, solo sales. Pero tú no sabes a qué te vas a venir aquí. Cuando yo llegué a la frontera de Estados Unidos, hay personas que te cruzas, no? Entonces yo antes de venirme, claro, ahorré un dinero como todos. Hay personas que te cruzan, te piden poco dinero y te cruzan. Cuando yo llegué a la frontera, que la verdad no me acuerdo el nombre fue. Cuando esa persona a mí me cruzó. Yo creo que fue la experiencia más madura y la que la experiencia que uno nunca olvido no? Cuando esta persona me cruza el Río Grande, que lo dicen todos. Esta persona quiso abusar de mí y entonces yo pues uno con miedo, porque aparte no conoces a personas, no? Y tú quieres como que, como que tú pides y suplicas que no lo hagan. Gracias a Dios no me, no me hizo nada. Gracias a Dios porque. Pero yo le supliqué, lo supliqué, me arrodillé que no me hiciera nada porque yo venía embarazada. Verdad, cuando yo venía, yo cuando me vine yo tenía otra pareja del actor que ya le había dicho que tenía. Pero tomé la decisión de venirme, por lo que ya lo había comentado, por las amenazas de la actual pareja que tenía, de la otra pareja que tenía y de sus familiares. Cuando yo me vine yo no sabía que una embarazada de mi pareja, pero aún así, digamos, me vine a dar cuenta de que más o menos yo pensaba que estaba embarazada. Pero aún así yo tomé la decisión de venirme. Cuando cruzo el río, esta persona intenta violarme a mí. Yo le supliqué, me arrodillé que no lo hiciera, que yo venía embarazada. Él me dijo que a él no le importaba, que igual lo iba a hacer. Gracias a Dios no pudo. No, no lo hizo porque justamente en ese en ese momento venía la lancha de migración y entonces él me dejó y se fue. Y por esa razón creo que fui salvada prácticamente que él no abusó de mí.

Ashley Machado [00:07:27] Cuánto le pagaste a él?

Chely Diaz [00:07:30] En ese tiempo. Me cobró como cien dólares, nada más.

Ashley Machado [00:07:38] Wow, that’s a little money. Tenías asistencia para que te ayudaran, para que le pagas a este hombre que te ayudó a cruzar?

Chely Diaz [00:07:44] No, porque como ahí cuando tú vas hay mucha gente, mucha gente que te dice págame tanto, yo te cruzo. Entonces prácticamente es en esa, en esa frontera. Tú conoces a mucha gente. Digamos no que tú la conozca, pero hay mucha gente que te ya saben a lo que tú vas.

Ashley Machado [00:08:06] Wow. Qué pasó cuando llegaste aquí en los Estados Unidos y a donde llegaste?

Chely Diaz [00:08:11] Cuando yo llegué a los Estados Unidos, cuando yo pues la persona intentó violar. Pues obvio, migración venía. Me detuvieron, me dijeron que me iban a meter presa porque en ese tiempo yo tenía ya había cumplido dieciocho años. Yo estaba con miedo, nerviosa, no hallaba ni qué decir, me temblaba el cuerpo, me temblaban las manos, me temblaba todo. Cuando me llevaron a declarar todo, que de dónde era y todo, yo no podía hablar por- de miedo. Entonces en ese momento yo me desmayé y después que yo me desmayé, yo me preguntaba que por qué me había desmayado. Yo le dije que estaba embarazada. Me hicieron una prueba de embarazo para ver si era verdad y salió positivo, que si estaba embarazada. Entonces me tuvieron ellos ahí como como tres horas. Tenía un hermano yo aquí en Virginia que era ciudadano. El le llamaron a él. Y a mi hermano yo no lo conocía porque prácticamente él se había venido por Estados Unidos desde que, desde que el era muy joven y pues casi no visitaba mi país ni nada así. Entonces prácticamente yo traía el teléfono de él porque por cualquier emergencia. Entonces lo llamaron a él y, y él no contestó. Entonces me tuvieron ahí como cuatro horas después me soltaron y me dijeron que me fuera para donde yo quisiera. En ese momento yo no sabía para dónde agarrar porque no conocía nada. Entonces lo que yo hice fue irme por la calle y parar los carros, el carro que quisiera ayudarme. Me acuerdo que una persona este se acercó a mí y me dijo “Te agarró migración?” Me dijo. Yo le dije “Sí”. Entonces me dije “Para dónde vas?” Y yo le dije “No sé para dónde voy”. Entonces él me dijo “Yo tengo, yo voy al trabajo”. Me dijo “Si tú quieres le pregunto a mi jefe si yo te puedo ayudar porque me das lástima”. Me dijo “Que estés aquí en la calle solo, no conoces a nadie”. Y yo le dije “Está bien”. Entonces le preguntó a su jefe es un jefe que todo bien. Me tuvo como una semana en su casa, por mientras mi hermano me contestaba y a ver si él me quería ayudar. Después le pregunté a mi hermano que si él me podía ayudar. Me dijeron que ellos me podían ayudar sólo a traerme para este estado, pero no hay ayudarme prácticamente económicamente.

Ashley Machado [00:10:59] En qué estado llegaste cuando estás aquí?

Chely Diaz [00:11:04] Llegué a Houston y después de Houston me vine para aquí, para Virginia.

Ashley Machado [00:11:15] Cómo puedes describir la experiencia viviendo aquí en los Estados Unidos esa semana con esa gente ayudándote.

Chely Diaz [00:11:23] Pues la verdad es muy duro porque tú no conoces las personas, pero de repente es duro porque no conoces. Pero a veces las personas en el camino y personas que son de buen corazón y lo hacen por ayudarte. Y la verdad que no me puedo quejar. Me ayudaron y estoy muy agradecida por eso.

Ashley Machado [00:11:53] Todavía tienes comunicaciones con esa gente?

Chely Diaz [00:11:56] La verdad que ni de su rostro me acuerdo, porque eso pasó hace años. La verdad que no me acuerdo la de ellos, porque tampoco ellos no te no te pueden ayudar a brindar ayuda a ayudarte darte de comer. Pero ellos jamás te van a dar un número de teléfono de comunicación porque tampoco ellos no se quieren meter a problema. Creo que ya así como lo hacen con uno, lo pueden hacer con cualquier persona. Pero no, desgraciadamente no tengo comunicación, no sé quienes fueron. Fue una persona, pero no sé su apellido, su nombre, nada. Pero, pero si este uno les agradece.

Ashley Machado [00:12:35] Ya llegando aquí a Virginia, a donde estamos ahorita viviendo, tu vida está igual 20 años. Cómo puedes distribuir la experiencia viviendo igual un inmigrante todavía?

Chely Diaz [00:12:52] Pues la experiencia que yo puedo decir es que. Ha cambiado mucho, digamos, cuando yo recién vine aquí a Virginia, bueno, yo vine a mi familia, me tuvo un tiempo, me ayudó un tiempo yo después de ese tiempo, pues yo decidí mudarme a otro lado, a buscar un trabajo. En aquellos tiempos era como que más fácil encontrar trabajo, no era tan difícil como en otros tiempos. Al principio, como todo inmigrante, no te cuesta muchísimo, porque no, uno no tiene tus documentos legales, otro no sabes el idioma. Entonces yo pienso que aquí haces, es lo que, el trabajo- el, cualquier trabajo que te ofrezcan para ti es bien.

Ashley Machado [00:13:47] Que trabajo garraste- cuál era el primer trabajo que recibiste llegando aquí?

Chely Diaz [00:13:56] Pues el primer trabajo que yo trabajé fue limpiando casas. Trabajé, trabajé por muchos años limpiando casas, digamos con diferentes personas. De repente trabajaba, pues un año como una, pero prácticamente el trabajo era lo mismo, siempre limpieza, porque es algo que a veces no te piden documentos. No, no tienes como que hablar un idioma. Entonces trabajé mucho, mucho tiempo de limpieza.

Ashley Machado [00:14:33] Cómo tenías esas conexiones con esa gente que limpiaba casas?

Chely Diaz [00:14:40] Pues a veces si tú te vas a la lavandería, la lavandería y ponen anuncios como de que rentan cuartos, cuidan niños, necesitan gente para trabajar y así como porque yo lo tuve.

Ashley Machado [00:15:01] Económicamente, era difícil para integrarte aquí en los Estados Unidos.

Chely Diaz [00:15:08] Económicamente.?

Ashley Machado [00:15:09] Sí, igual cuando en toda tu vida viviendo aquí.

Chely Diaz [00:15:15] Pues la verdad que económicamente sí fue muy difícil. Tuve que enfrentarme a muchas cosas porque como se lo comenté, vine embarazada después de que a los meses después nació mi hija y tuve que luchar. A veces no tenía como decir ni para comprarle a ella una caja de pan, pero una caja de wipes. Era, era difícil porque tú te sentías como que solo me entiendes porque sentía como que o no tengo familia y no tengo nada. Y si la tengo, no es como que la tuviera porque no te apoya en el 100 por ciento, digamos, ni el 50. Entonces era muy difícil porque te tenías que enfrentar muchas cosas. Había veces que que trabajaba y solo me alcanzaba para la renta y para mi comida. Y a veces conforme el tiempo en este país tú conoces a gente, no? Entonces te haces de amigos o de personas conocidas y de repente tú tienes que pedir a esas personas ayuda. Me puedes prestar o regalar siquiera 50 dólares para comprar una caja de pan, por una caja wipes? Es difícil, es bien duro, digamos, la que tú tienes que vivir, me entiendes? Porque aquí no es que vas a venir, vas a tener a tus hijos y te van a donar ayuda aquí. A mí principalmente me ha costado demasiado.

Ashley Machado [00:16:54] Era difícil para integrarte en esta este estilo americano, como muchos dicen.

Chely Diaz [00:17:01] Es difícil. Uno, es muy difícil porque no sabes el idioma, no sabes el idioma y mucha gente cuando tú no sabes el idioma es te rechaza. Porque lo primero que dicen o anda a la escuela o vete de mi país, no es difícil. No, no, no. No voy a mentir. En muchas ocasiones sufrí demasiada discriminación y prácticamente por el idioma.

Ashley Machado [00:17:31] Qué cosas te dijeron cuando experiencias cosas igual de discriminación porque no hablabas inglés?

Chely Diaz [00:17:41] Había muchas personas que decían a qué viniste a este país sino no entiendes el idioma. O, o te miraban mal, o a veces te hacían como “O tú eres inmigrante, tu eres hispano, anda, vete de este país. Aprende el idioma. Acá estamos en Estados Unidos. En Estados Unidos se habla inglés, no se habla español”. Entonces muchas veces si te duele, me entiendes, que te digan eso, porque no es que uno quisiera venir por, porque o porque uno quiere, sino a veces las circunstancias de la vida te obligan a venir. Bien Te vienes o mueres en tu país, entonces tú decides venir. Pero no, no, uno no le viene a robar nada a nadie. Vienes a trabajar. Claro que duele no saber el idioma porque todo el mundo deseáramos, me entiendes, aprender bien el idioma. Pero a veces nosotros los hispanos tenemos la mayoría venimos a trabajar, no tenemos tiempo de ir a una escuela, estudiar. Por qué? Porque venimos a trabajar. Entonces a veces tú te sientes como que dices tú, yo quisiera aprenderlo, pero no tengo el tiempo para aprenderlo porque? Porque tienes tantas cosas que hacer que te enfoca más en tu trabajo que ir a una escuela.

Ashley Machado [00:19:03] Tú tenías la oportunidad para ir a escuela, para aprender inglés?

Chely Diaz [00:19:08] Tuve la oportunidad, digamos, porque hay iglesias que te ayudan a ti, que tú puedes ir dos veces a la semana a aprender inglés, que es gratis prácticamente. Entonces yo fui o por varios años fui a una iglesia que te ayudaba los martes y los jueves te daban clases de 7 de la noche, 9 la noche. Entonces, poco a poco a poco iba, aprendía, me entiendes? Porque todo el mundo queremos no saberlo perfecto, pero defenderte.

Ashley Machado [00:19:46] Aprendiste bastante cuando ibas ahí?

Chely Diaz [00:19:49] Sí, aprendí mucho porque le ponía, le ponía interés a las clases porque quería superarme. Quería al menos que cuando alguien me hablara, tal vez no hablarlo perfecto, pero sí entender o, responder lo que ellos me querían decir, o lo que yo quería contestar.

Ashley Machado [00:20:13] Quería preguntar algo de trabajo. Era difícil ir acostumbrándote a todos los, igual, demandas aquí en los Estados Unidos, como tienes trabajar o 40 horas o más?

Chely Diaz [00:20:30] Una no te entiende la pregunta, perdón.

Ashley Machado [00:20:34] Era difícil acostumbrándote a los Estados Unidos demandaste trabajando cierta horas?

Chely Diaz [00:20:42] Mmm, la verdad creo que no era difícil porque como te dije anteriormente, yo trabajo en la limpieza. La limpieza tienes hora de entrada, pero no de salido. A veces puede te pueden recoger a las siete, siete y media, pero nunca te dicen vas a salir a las tres. Nunca tengo una hora exacta. Si son vas a trabajar siete u ocho horas. Nunca. O sea, entonces prácticamente tú te acostumbras aquí a lo que sea con tal de salir adelante. Tú no te importa si trabajas diez horas, entonces tú te acostumbras.

Ashley Machado [00:21:18] Viniendo aquí a los Estados Unidos, cómo te sentías de relaciones con otra gente? Igual que te sentían igual que estaban bien agradecida que estabas aquí o sentían igual que no te gustaron tu presencia aquí.

Chely Diaz [00:21:34] Mira, yo pienso que hay muchas cosas, hay muchas. Como te digo, hay muchas veces que te encuentras en el camino, gente buena, buena, como te encuentras, gente mala, aunque sea de tú, de tu propio origen, aunque sean a veces hispanos. A veces hay personas hispanas, pero a mí me tocó mucho muchos trabajos de limpieza, digamos que yo trabajaba y a veces la gente, porque tal vez el dueño de la compañía tal vez esta legal en el país, habla un poco más de idioma, te quieren humillar, te quieren, o sea pagar lo que ellos quieren porque? Porque lo primero que dicen o yo te doy trabajo, me entiendes? Entonces tú tienes que aguantar eso. Y muchas veces si este aguanté, aguanté muchas humillaciones de mi propia, de mi. Duele decirlo, pero a veces de tu propia gente hispana, tú a veces aguantas mucha cosa, como te digo, a veces cuando ellos hablan el idioma o son legales, ellos se creen mucho, mucho más que ti. Y Te quieren hacer a ti como sentir menos, solo porque tal vez tú no hablas el idioma o porque tú no estás legal en este país.

Ashley Machado [00:22:58] Crees que era difícil para entregar- integrar, en esta cultura nueva, ya que venir aquí joven o un poco- un poco de ella?

Chely Diaz [00:23:12] Si es difícil para, uno primero que te cuesta las costumbres que tienen aquí. Principalmente el idioma y cuesta bastante adaptarte. Pero tú tratas de integrarte también al sistema de vida porque quieras o no quieras, vives en un país que no es tuyo. Entonces tú tratas de agarrar costumbres que en tu país no han existido y que para ti es nuevo, pero tú tratas como de de acostumbrarte o de adaptar las costumbres de este país y pienso que al principio les cuesta todos, pero conforme los años como que tú te vas acostumbrando a todo, a todas las culturas o a todas las cosas que ellos van haciendo o las que están en este país.

Ashley Machado [00:24:07] Qué costumbres era nuevo para tú cuando estabas viviendo aquí?

Chely Diaz [00:24:12] Pues, para mí las las, las costumbres era como celebrar el Día de Acción de Gracias. Para mí era nuevo, por ejemplo, celebrar Halloween. En mi país nunca se celebraba Halloween, tampoco el Día de Acción de Gracias. Entonces para mí como que eso era nuevo. También el Easter day que le dice tan poco en mi país no se celebra. Son muchas cosas que no se celebran en tu país, pero cuando tú vienes a este país y tratas de hacer una familia aquí, tú quieres que tus hijos conserven la cultura de este país, porque es algo que si tú no lo enseñas en tu casa, igual se lo van a enseñar en la escuela. Entonces es bueno a los hijos enseñarles tanto como tus culturas como la cultura del país que son ellos. Entonces fue difícil al mismo tiempo, pero pero es fácil acostumbrarte a este país. Te adaptas como que muy rápido a las culturas que ellos tienen.

Ashley Machado [00:25:22] Tú crees que tiempo ayudó para adaptarte con todas las culturas?

Chely Diaz [00:25:27] Yo creo que sí. Me ayudó mucho en adaptación. O sea, como te digo, como todo cuesta, pero si llegas a un momento que hasta a ti te gustan las culturas que este país tiene.

Ashley Machado [00:25:41] Hablando de culturas, qué culturas tienes de Honduras que pusiste en tu vida y las vidas de tus hijos para preservar la cultura hondureño?

Chely Diaz [00:25:59] Pues la verdad que casi no les voy a mentir, no quiero ser mentirosa en esto. Casi yo no he tenido tiempo de enseñarle a mis hijos las culturas, verdad? Porque a veces ah, pero sí, por ejemplo comidas de mi país les enseño mucho. Por ejemplo en mi país están la las danzas verdad? De mi país, que es un baile folclórico, está la música, la música que nosotros tenemos, que es una música de de los música de los indígenas, música de los garífunas, porque en Honduras existe mucha gente de color. Entonces nosotros como que siempre mantenemos como que viva la cultura de ellos, verdad? Entonces por ejemplo sus comidas siempre bueno, yo les de trato de enseñar a ella o esta es la una comida que los indígenas hacen o otra comida que hacen los garífunas. Entonces como que como te digo, eso es algo que tú quieres que tus hijos entiendan de donde ellos vienen. Porque ellos ellos tienen que saber el origen de lo que es o de los padres vienen.

Ashley Machado [00:27:27] Era difícil para acostumbrar entonces tus hijos con la cultura hondureña ya que estaban nacidos aquí?

Chely Diaz [00:27:37] Bueno, cuando los niños son un poco pequeños, ellos no como que no le prestan atención, tal vez a lo que son tos, son tos, digamos tus costumbres en tu país, porque ellos prácticamente nacen aquí. Por primer idioma, para ellos es el inglés. Entonces como que, cuando están pequeño como que no, ellos no prestan mucha atención. Ya cuando van grande, esto trata de decirle mira, esto es la cultura, hacemos esto le trata de enseñar videos. A los trata de involucrar en algunas cosas que tu dices para que ellos sepan de donde tú eres, de donde tú veniste. Y son como las, por ejemplo, la fiesta que es mi país hace que son en septiembre que se celebra el Día de la Independencia de Honduras el 15 de septiembre. Entonces yo le enseño a ellas que cosa es lo que hacen. Por ejemplo el 10 de septiembre es el día del niño. En mi país cuando le celebran a todos los niños, les dan de comer y lo revientan piñata es algo que yo les digo miren todo esto hacen en mi país. Entonces es como que como que ellos después dicen ay, que qué bonito lo que hacen ellos, como que ya cuando están grande le ponen un poquito de interés todo. A veces le dice a uno mira a este este vestido son vestidos que usaban los indígenas, usaban estos. O sea, tú tratas de que ellos entiendan cual es tu costumbre y tu cultura es al mismo tiempo.

Ashley Machado [00:29:18] Ellos se acostumbraron a la cultura hondureña?

Chely Diaz [00:29:22] Pues yo pienso que estaba acostumbrada a las dos culturas, tanto por lo mismo que pues aunque tú vengas a este país, tú nunca dejas prácticamente, digamos, de llevar la cultura en tu sangre, o las tradiciones o las comidas. Entonces yo pienso que ellos, ellos sí tienen como esa cosa presente de la cultura, porque pues prácticamente uno se las va diciendo y yo pienso que si.

Ashley Machado [00:29:58] Hay otra dificultadas que ha recibido aquí en los Estados Unidos que, que todavía encuentras difícil?

Chely Diaz [00:30:09] Pues la verdad sí hay muchas dificultades, porque, por ejemplo, yo pienso que esto nunca se va a acabar. Las dificultades de antes, cuando yo vine, como les dije, era muy fácil obtener un trabajo. Te llevabas un trabajo a otro, no te daban nada. Ahora es muy difícil obtener un trabajo. Ahora siempre te dicen si no tienes esto, no hay trabajo. Entonces yo pienso que que es difícil todavía.

Ashley Machado [00:30:46] Hay una experiencias con gente que son ciudadanos o inmigrantes o parte de tu comunidad que te hizo sentir- te recuerdas todavía y que todavía queda contigo?

Chely Diaz [00:31:04] Sí, si yo trabajaba. Yo trabajaba con una. Después de los años conocí a una amiga que era muy buena persona. Los metimos a trabajar en una compañía. Me acuerdo que una vez estaba un señor americano y me dijo este estamos hablando yo con la muchacha en español y me gritó. Él era el maná, el perdón, el ingeniero, y me dijo que me callara la boca y que dejara de hablar español porque era un país donde se hablaba sólo inglés. Y me dijo Si vas a hablar español, te me largas horita para, para tu país. Y yo le dije Con todo respeto, yo te respeto a ti. Tú hablas inglés? Perfecto, yo te respeto. Se supone que este país es de leyes y este país es de muchas costumbres. Porque aquí no solamente hay personas que hablan español. Hay muchas personas que hablan muchos idiomas. Tú me estás, le dije yo, ofendiendo, discriminando sólo porque yo hablo español. Yo estoy hablando español con ella. Cuando tú me hablas a mí en inglés, yo te contesto en inglés. Yo ningún momento te estoy hablando a ti en español, le dije. Y me acuerdo bien que yo le dije yo cuando yo hablo contigo hablo inglés, y cuando hablo con ella hablo español. Tú no te tienes que molestar porque este país es libre de expresarse como tú quieres. Tú me estás discriminando, le dije yo. Y me dijo este país se habla español y si no me dijo te largas, pues yo me largo, pero primero te voy a reportar con la oficina, le dije yo, porque lo que me estás haciendo a mí es discriminación y eso no se hace. Por, le dije yo, porque este país es libre de hablar lo que tú quieras. Entonces sí me sentí como ofendida, no me quedé callada porque me pude defender en inglés de esta persona. Pero a veces te como que como que discriminada, me entiendes? Por ejemplo, casi yo nunca me he dejado, digamos que me ofenda de esa manera. Ah, gracias a Dios aprendí un poquito de inglés, no lo sé, perfecto a hablar, pero aprendí un poco parece que era para defenderme. Me acuerdo perfectamente que estaba yo en un centro comercial, estaba haciendo línea para pagar y había otra persona atrás de mí, un hispano era. Había otra persona detrás de la hispano, que era gente de color y vino. Y sólo porque el muchacho no hablaba inglés lo empezó a ofender y a decirle de todo. Entonces, en ese momento, a veces, como te digo, no es a ti que te lo están haciendo, por lo tanto van haciendo tu gente y a veces tú te sientes mal y tú quieres defender a esa persona. Porque muchos de nosotros a veces, tal vez por no saber el idioma o por tener miedo, nos quedamos callados, solamente agachamos las miradas y nos quedamos callado. Tal vez por no tener problema con la policía, porque tú sabes que si la policía viene le van a creer a la otra persona, porque a ti jamás te van a creer, porque primero te miran por el color de piel o por la raza, a más te van a creer. Entonces muchos nos quedamos callados, pero como te digo, yo he tratado de defender mi derecho. Porque sea que sea de este país o no seas, yo pienso que tenemos la obligación nosotros de defendernos nosotros. Es lo que es, lo que yo pienso y que es justo.

Ashley Machado [00:34:51] Tu todavía tienes dificultades o enfrentas dificultades así o miras a gente todavía?

Chely Diaz [00:34:59] Yo pienso que esto nunca se va a acabar. Yo pienso que siempre la gente por tu ser latina prácticamente te miran mal, no te lo dicen, pero tú en sus gestos de las personas. Tú miras que las personas sólo por ser latina te miran mal o personas creen que porque somos latinos dirán esta persona que, a veces las personas han hablado con otras personas cerca de mí, pensando que uno no entiende, me entienden? Tú te sientes mal. No les contesto porque directamente no te lo dicen a ti, pero se ponen a hablar, a decir cosas y si a mucha gente yo he visto como te digo. La humillación que les hacen, pero como siempre a nosotros nos quedamos callados por el miedo, tal vez de no querer regresarlos a tu país. Porque de repente, pues tú sabes, o si me meto un problema, vino la policía, me van a detener, me van a mandar y muchas personas necesitan estar en este país, necesitamos prácticamente verdad? Entonces por eso uno a veces se calla, pero a veces no tenemos que callar los porque estamos en un país donde se supone que que tenemos derechos todos a la libertad de expresar lo que nosotros sentimos.

Ashley Machado [00:36:28] Pues quería preguntar qué experiencias tienes con pues le ambiente aquí en los Estados Unidos hablando de políticas.

Chely Diaz [00:36:39] Pues de política, la verdad a mi casi no me gusta hablar mucho de política, porque como dicen, la política en todos países es lo mismo. Siempre prometen, prometen y nunca hacen nada. Yo pienso que esto de la política jamás va a cambiar. Y si hay personas, que hay presidentes que han hecho buenas obras para la comunidad hispana, hay mucho presidente que no los han querido, los han discriminado, los han visto de la peor. Pero como te digo casi a mí de política casi no me gusta hablar mucho, porque ellos prometen, prometen y nunca cumplen.

Ashley Machado [00:37:20] Tú crees que la gente aquí ha ayudado para hacer los procesos de inmigración más difícil?

Chely Diaz [00:37:33] Yo pienso que el proceso de migración desde hace años es difícil, pero yo pienso que se vino a hacer más difícil desde que pasó lo de las Torres Gemelas era como que era un poco más fácil. Tú podías venirte, podía patrocinar un jefe, te daban documento, pero desde que pasó eso creo que para la raza inmigrante latino creo que ha sido lo peor, porque como que se han enfocado más en nosotros. Es lo que yo pienso, se han enfocado más en la raza latina.

Ashley Machado [00:38:12] Y hablando de todo eso, quería preguntarte si recibiste los ciuid- si te hiciste un citizen aquí en los Estados Unidos?

Chely Diaz [00:38:24] Pues lamentablemente ya van pasando 20 años y desgraciadamente sigo esperando. Sigo esperando que algún día a mi sueño se cumpla y pueda decir yo o tengo o tal vez no la ciudadanía no, pero un permiso que te diga estoy legal aquí estoy bien, pues desgraciadamente no he podido. Tengo 20 años casi en este país y desgraciadamente no tengo un estatuto legal.

Ashley Machado [00:38:59] No he tenido todo estado legal. Tú te sientes igual que eres una americana aquí. O como todos dicen.

Chely Diaz [00:39:09] Pues la verdad, no me siento americano realmente, porque creo que aunque los tuviera, no me sintiera americano, digamos. Ah, pero es difícil, me entiendes? No tenerlos o uno no sentirse. Porque a veces te acostumbras tanto a este país, te acostumbras tanto que que de repente a veces te sientes y a veces no te sientes. Esto es como un limbo, querer sentirte y al mismo tiempo reaccionas y tú dices quisiera sentirme todo el tiempo tú, tú aceptas tu realidad y sabes que no lo eres.

Ashley Machado [00:39:53] Y tú, rio haces aquí para superarte. En otras palabras, tú crees que has llegado para para obtener como todos emigrantes sueñen para tener el American Dream?

Chely Diaz [00:40:11] Puede ser American Dream? Lo sigo esperando realmente. Ah, no te voy a negar que sufrí demasiado mis trabajos, sufrí por mucho tiempo, sufrí humillaciones con sueldos bajos. Pero te voy a decir te hace prácticamente tres años atrás. No es que he cumplido, como dice el sueño americano, verdad? Pero creo que ahorita no lo estoy cumpliendo, pero como que los estoy empezando a realizar prácticamente. Gracias a Dios tengo un trabajo, buen trabajo. Trabajo para unas personas americanas que son personas que Dios me ha puesto en el camino, son personas que ellos no les importa tu color, tu raza, tu estado, no les importa nada. Simplemente lo que ellos valoran de ti es tu trabajo. Y digamos que después de prácticamente de 17 años viviendo en este país, yo me he sentido valorada por esas personas porque son personas que que entienden cual es tu salario. No, no, no, ellos no son como las demás personas que te dicen no, porque tú eres aquí te voy a pagar esto no? Bendito sea Dios y siempre, siempre lo digo y siempre lo voy a estar agradecido. No lo he cumplido. Deseo, sueño con cumplir el sueño americano, lo sueño. Le pido a Dios todo el tiempo de algún día realizarlo, pero por el momento desgraciadamente no lo he hecho. Pero es que tengo fe en Dios, tengo fe, mucha fe en Dios que que lo voy a lograr, que lo voy a lograr. Como dicen, todo viene despacio, todo con con ayuda de Dios y con ayuda de tu trabajo. Todo es despacio y lo voy a lograr.

Ashley Machado [00:42:17] Para tu que es el sueño americano?

Chely Diaz [00:42:21] Pues paso por el sueño americano para, para todos es digamos tener tu residencia, tener tu propia casa y estar legal en este país. Yo pienso que para mi es el sueño americano y no podre hablar por otras personas porque no sé el pensamiento de ello, pero para mi el sueño americano es ser digamos ciudadano de este país, tener mi propia casa. Ese sería mi sueño, que yo diría este es mi sueño americano, el que yo quisiera.

Ashley Machado [00:43:04] Todavía tienes conexiones con tu país de origen? Igual en forma que viajas ahí o que tienes familia ahí?

Chely Diaz [00:43:17] Puedes viajar como les dije anteriormente, casi con 20 años de haberme venido de mi país. Dejando, pues, a mis padres, a mi hija. Y pues realmente desde que me vine en el 2002 no he regresado. Y sí, comunicación tengo con mis hermanas. Tengo dos hermanas en mi país, tenía cuatro hermanas. Cuando me vine uno murió de cáncer, la otra, desgraciadamente, como les había comentado anteriormente, en mi país es violento, la mataron, la mataron las maras, la mataron a ella en el en el año serían como unos 4 años, otros cuatro o cinco años atrás. Desgraciadamente la mataron a ella dejando huérfanos a cuatro niños. Si tengo conexión con mis hermanas, les hablo, les ayudo de vez en cuando. Pero viajar sí. Me gustaría viajar, viajar y digamos no vivir allá porque mentiroso fuera si yo le dijera que que quisiera regresar y vivir no, porque es como revivir mi pasado. Es como, como reabrir mi pasado. Es algo que, mi pasado fue tan feo para mí o tal vez tengo, sigo teniendo el mismo miedo, tal vez de de regresar y enfrentarme a lo que viví. Tengo mucho miedo. Tal vez es eso lo que me queda como que me que me cierra mi cabeza en querer no regresar, verdad? Pero al mismo tiempo, pues tú sabes que tiene más familiares ahí que deseas. Eso es una cosa, otras cosas que uno y bueno, para mí es duro, verdad? Porque yo cuando me vine, como les dije a mis padres o mis hermanos, a mi hija y desgraciadamente yo perdí a mis padres, a los dos. Entonces fue difícil perderlos, porque tú sabes que nunca lo vas a volver a ver y claro, tú deseas en ese momento que te dicen tu padre falleció, correr, agarrar un vuelo y largarte por tu país. Pero al mismo tiempo tú tienes hijos y entonces tú no estás como entre la espada y la pared, que dices tú si me voy, no regreso. Tengo mis hijos aquí. Qué futuro- si yo me vine de mi país porque es un país que no te da oportunidades, entonces tú no quieres llevarte a tus hijos o que pase lo mismo tuyo. Entonces con dolor en tu corazón, tú decides enterrar a tus padres lejos por lo mismo, por no querer regresarte, por que tus hijos no sufran lo que tú sufriste. Entonces es duro, es duro, pero al mismo tiempo este tú te sientes como hija, al menos yo como hija me siento bien. Porque como pude yo les ayude a ellos. Y si hay muchas veces que he soñado que he regresado, pero cuando yo en mis sueños sueño regresado, yo lo único que miro son dos tumbas y es algo que me me cierra la mente y y ahorita como se lo digo no lloro porque es una entrevista verdad? Pero pero es algo que te achicharra el corazón, te lo hace chiquitito el corazón de ver que tú desearas regresar y al mismo tiempo no quiero regresar por tal vez por no revivir cosas que que han pasado. Entonces, pero cómo estamos como, como dice mientras la espada y la pared. Quiero regresar a tu país y al mismo tiempo quedarte en este país. Tú sabes que no es tuyo, pero tú lo has cogido como tu país.

Ashley Machado [00:47:47] Si. Te sientes igual un miembro de estos sos-  igual de esta comunidad aquí en los Estados Unidos?

Chely Diaz [00:48:02] Pues pienso que sí, porque te adaptas a costumbres, a muchas cosas y conforme pasan los años tú, tú tratas de acostumbrarte a algo que sabes tú que no es tuyo, verdad?. Pero tú tratas de acostumbrarme. Y a veces me siento como que en mi corazón siento, me siento como que pertenezco aquí porque prácticamente he vivido la mitad de mi vida en este país. Entonces hay momentos que sí, a veces se te olvida de dónde vienen, verdad? Y de repente tú te sientes pero yo no soy de aquí porque me tengo que adaptar a cosas. Pero yo pienso que eso no me pasa sólo a mí. Yo pienso que le pasa a muchas personas como yo.

Ashley Machado [00:48:50] La final pregunta es, tienes algo más que quieres decir que es parte de la vida inmigración que no sentiste que discutimos?

Chely Diaz [00:49:13] Oh, bueno, yo creo que lo que no discutimos en este caso fue el sistema de salud de este país. Y como experiencia del sistema de salud, te voy a decir algo. Bueno, aquí nosotros por ser hispanos, no tenemos muchas oportunidades de tener seguro médico. Por ser inmigrante no tenemos seguro médico gordo, muchos a veces tenemos ayuda, pero no es una ayuda que te apoya el 100 por ciento. Bueno, te voy a hablar de mi, de mi caso. Pues yo por muchos años pasé con piedras en la vesícula. Pasé tres años sufriendo de piedras en la vesícula, sufriendo y sufriendo. Iba al hospital, me regresaban y me decían que no, que tenía que ir al hospital o cuando- lo único que hacían era que me que me decía no me daban una pastilla y se me quitaba. Me acuerdo que la última vez que yo fui al hospital yo no aguantaba, yo sentía que me moría y ellos no me querían atender. Pasé tres horas en el hospital llorando, tirada en el piso porque la verdad yo no aguantaba. No quería ir al hospital porque yo sabía que siempre que iba al hospital nunca me atendían y siempre por seres, por ser tal vez latino. No, no te hacía mucho caso. Me acuerdo que esa vez se paró una señora americana y les gritó y les dijo atiendan a ella, no están viendo cómo está sufriendo. Entonces cuando la señora se paró, vinieron ellos y me me sacaron de la sala de emergencia y me fueron a llevar a un pasillo del hospital. En ese pasillo vino un enfermero, me puso una morfina. Me acuerdo que me la puso tan enojado que cuando me la puso bañó la pared de sangre y me metió la aguja y me la sacó y me dijo Ya puedes, ya puedes irte. Yo me quedé como que Dios mío! O sea, lo hizo porque la persona le gritó pero si no, él me hubiera dejado morir ahí. Entonces, a veces yo no entiendo a veces el sistema de salud de este país, porque igual vas al hospital, te mandan el billete, lo pagas. Pero a veces muchos de nosotros los los inmigrantes, digamos, a veces nos aguantamos los dolores de no, de no querer ir a un hospital porque sabes que no te van a atender. Entonces yo pienso que este país sí, a veces debe cambiar un poquito, digamos, el sistema de salud. Otra sería la emigración, así como yo. No sólo yo, muchos de los latinos inmigrantes, algunos que tenemos 20 años casi estar aquí, algunos que tienen, he conocido personas que tienen 30 o 40 años de vivir aquí. Y no les dan la oportunidad de venir y decir vamos a hablar de un documento, les vamos a dar permiso, trabajo. Tú sabes que uno con un permiso de trabajo tú, pues había muchas cosas. Por ejemplo, en mi caso yo no tengo un permiso de trabajo. Yo hago impuestos todos los años y todos los años por ganar caso, digamos, porque a mí no me pagan en calidad de cheque por ganar caso. Yo pago mucho dinero de impuestos, todos los años pago impuestos, no lo pido al gobierno, no le quito el gobierno, pero aún así los ponen mucho pretextos. A veces yo pienso que es injusto las leyes de este país, por ejemplo, no tengo nada de contra de las personas que vienen ahorita. Yo sé que todos vienen por lo mismo que yo vine, verdad? Pero a veces tú mira personas que recién vienen y les dan ayudas y tú dices por qué, Dios mío, yo tengo tantos años. Vengo de la casa al trabajo, hago las cosas correctas y no puedo tener un documento, hago impuestos, no le robo a nadie, no le pido a nadie. Entonces yo pienso que si, si ellos fueran un poco conscientes, ellos dijeron vamos a dar a las personas que en verdad las personas merecen, o las personas que califican o las personas que ellos miran. Pero a veces yo pienso que a veces la vida acaba bien injusta. Por ejemplo, tú vienes del trabajo, la casa, no cometer ningún error y la vida como que te ataca más a ti. Hay personas que yo he visto muchos casos hispano que andan tomando o robando o haciendo muchas cosas y esas personas las agarran, el dan documento. Entonces yo no entiendo las leyes de este país. Me gustaría entenderlos, pero no los entiendo. Ósea dices tú me porto bien, te va mal. Me porto mal, me voy, me va bien. Entonces yo pienso que es algo que se deben de enfocar en la gente que tienen años pagando sus impuestos y viviendo en este país. Entonces yo pienso que es algo que ellos sí se deben enfocar en, en primero la poner principalmente a las personas que tenemos muchos años. Es lo que yo pienso. En mi opinión,

Ashley Machado [00:55:05] Piensas que la vida inmigrante aquí es se puso más difícil en estos años, igual o no, viviendo aquí en los Estados Unidos y la gente viniendo.

Chely Diaz [00:55:19] Yo pienso que si dura, yo pienso que se ha puesto más duro. Bueno, como te digo, cuando yo vine todo el tiempo ha sido duro. Pero yo pienso que hace unos ocho años, diría yo, ocho años atrás. Esto ha sido más, más duro. Yo pienso que las leyes se han hecho mucho más madura para para el emigrante.

Ashley Machado [00:55:50] Igual que leyes puedes decir que hizo la vida más dura. Perdón que leyes han hecho tu vida más difícil aquí.

Chely Diaz [00:56:03] Por ejemplo, las leyes de que. Bueno, pienso que qué leyes no te podré decir específicamente qué leyes más duras en este país, porque acá todas las leyes son duras. Aquí no hay una ley que sea blanda, que diga aquí todo cuesta. Pero yo pienso que, que de que las leyes se han vuelto un poco más duras. Yo pienso que eso es porque una a los años anteriores no se miraba como que claro, todo el tiempo inmigrantes han venido a este país, pero como que últimos estos últimos años atrás, como que mucho más personas que vienen. Entonces eso, ellos lo que hacen es endurecer las leyes, no para lo que viene, sino para que este en el que está dentro, o sea, para nosotros que estamos adentro las leyes son difíciles. Entonces es como que ellos se enfocan más en la gente que viene y a la gente que está la han dejado, digamos, la han dejado en el olvido.

Ashley Machado [00:57:24] La última pregunta va a ser. Si. Tú crees que los Estados Unidos es igual? Es igual. En otras palabras, tu casa ahora, ya que veniste, es de otro país?

Chely Diaz [00:57:46] Pues realmente para mí Estados Unidos, mi casa. Realmente yo se lo digo de corazón, desde lo más profundo de mi corazón, se lo digo para mi este es el país que me brindó la oportunidad que mi país de origen no me la dio. Fueron días muy duros, muchos, muchas lágrimas lloré, pero fue un país que me brindó la ayuda y como se lo digo. Amo a mi país, no se lo puedo negar, pero al mismo tiempo no deseaba realizar, no deseara. Es para mi. Este es mi país y me siento un poco egoísta en decir eso, porque realmente yo me pongo a pensar este no es tu país y a veces lloro y digo no te puedes enfocar en este país porque no es tuyo, porque tú no naciste aquí. Pero para mí este es mi país y siempre lo digo, estoy feliz orgullosamente principal porque mis hijos nacieron aquí, gracias a Dios son ciudadanas americanas. Otras oportunidades que he tenido jamás, jamás se la hubiera obtenido mi país y para mi me siento, me siento orgullosamente feliz de estar en este país.

Ashley Machado [00:59:18] Okay, pues eso es todos los productos que yo tuve. Gracias por tu tiempo y que tengas un buen día.

Chely Diaz [00:59:26] Gracias a ti por entrevistarme. Fue un placer. Muchísimas gracias.