Interview with Sharida Savi Sinanan
Sharida always says, “I outshine. You could find me in any crowd in Westport.” Here, she is referring to her dark complexion compared to the typical Caucasian Connecticuter. Though she may stand out, you would not know the things Sharida has endured just by passing her on the street. You would not know that she has a husband and son living 2,000 miles away. You would not know that she had to work many strenuous jobs before finding one she absolutely loves. You would not know that she once left America in tears and had the courage to immigrate a second time. Sharida candidly shares all this in her story of immigrating from Trinidad and Tobago to the United States.
Method: When I first reached out to Sharida, she immediately agreed to sharing her story. Sharida (though I know her as Savi) is the nanny of my mom’s best friend’s family. We have met in person before and she is an amiable hostess and zealous conversationalist. We agreed to do the interview over Zoom because we live in different states. I had my outline of questions prepared but all I told Sharida in advance were the three overarching themes: life in her home country, the immigration process, and her experiences of reception in the United States. Sharida has been interviewed before about her immigration experience so she seemed prepared with the story she wanted to tell. Therefore, as we dove into her story, I didn’t get to ask as many direct questions as I planned. Though I didn’t guide the discussion as much as I thought I would, I had no problem relating her story to the topics we have learned in class. If anything, this exemplifies how the topics we learned really do play out in individual lives.
Summary and Analysis: Sharida began by sharing the story of her great grandparents’ immigration from India to Trinidad and Tobago. During the time Sharida’s great grandparents were alive, India was a British colony. Sharida recalls her grandmother saying that her parents were enticed by “a land of milk and honey” promised by the British colonists. Sharida theorizes that her great grandparents must have been very poor and therefore motivated by economics: “I always say to myself, there must have been a reason they left India […] because nobody would leave if they had everything.” This reminds me of the World Migration Report statistic we often referred to in class, that only 3-4% of the global population lives outside of their birth country. There has to be a combination of push and pull factors that motivate people to leave their home. Sharida theorizes that poverty pushed her great grandparents out of India, and we will explore what pushed Sharida out of Trinidad and Tobago and what pulled her to the United States.
Thruston, Benny. “Marcus Bay @ Trinidad and Tobago.” 2019. Unsplash. https://unsplash.com/photos/Nldzdg2K95Q.
Sharida’s great grandparents created a life for themselves in Trinidad and Tobago as indentured laborers farming rice and sugarcane. A few generations pass and then Sharida is born into a family of five children. Her family lived in the countryside in a home with food on the table. Nevertheless, it was still expensive to raise five children. At the age of 13, Sharida had to drop out of school to take care of her grandfather. Sharida emphasizes that she “was very happy to do it.” We’ll see throughout her story how Sharida was always grateful to work and determined to do her job well, no matter the circumstances.
Still, caring for her grandparents took away Sharida’s dream of completing her education and getting an office job. By the age of 19, Sharida wanted a job with a salary. She got a job working in a flower shop and eventually became a florist herself. At the age of 25, Sharida got married and a year later, she had a son to appease her traditional Indian family. Sharida recounts that there was a lot of tension between their families because she is Muslim and her husband is Hindu so it was untraditional for them to marry. On top of this, her husband’s job was inconsistent and Sharida’s wage at the flower shop was not enough to support their son. Having grown up poor herself, Sharida’s son was her main motivation to come to America: “maybe I should try to get a visa and go and see if I can make a better life for my son. Not for me, but for my son.”
Sharida’s experience immigrating exemplifies Massey’s theory: the new economics of migration. According to this theory, the community and individual household is the main actor. If one household gains a new source of income from an immigrant family member, the community becomes deprived relative to that household. Sharida recalls that she got the idea to come to America because she had seen friends from Trinidad and Tobago do the same. Secondly, the individual household becomes a motivating factor. Even if it meant being away from her baby boy, Sharida knew that her household and his life would be more stable if she were sending her family money from America.
Sharida and her husband in traditional Indian clothing.
Sharida recalls how difficult it was to get a visa from the embassy. They wanted her to have land on her name, a good job, money in the bank, and a house on her name. Interestingly, Sharida shares that “you must have ties to come back to Trinidad. They don’t want you to come in and staying in America.” Sharida was lucky enough to meet most requirements and she was granted a tourist visa lasting one year. In addition to these exclusive regulations, another way Customs and Border Protection tries to ensure that people with non-immigrant visas do not overstay is by making them go home after the first three or six months of their visa. So even though Sharida got a one-year visa, she had to visit home before the end of the first six months.
Sharida explains how many immigrants come to America using tourist visas, but the limitation is that they have to work off the book or low-status jobs. This aligns with Piore’s dual-labor market theory. In a capitalist society like America, primary sector jobs are reserved for natives laborers. Though secondary sector jobs are valuable to supporting the economy, migrant laborers must work these jobs that are unstable, have low wages, and little room for advancing. Nevertheless, Sharida reminds us that immigrants have a dual-frame reference and know that their secondary sector jobs in America are better than jobs in their home country: “we all, you know, came for some point because we want to send money back to the country. So the kids can have a better life.”
Sharida when she first came to America.
When Sharida first came to America, she went to New York City where she had two aunts. Though Sharida recalls that “they were struggling too, they didn’t have papers neither” they at least provided Sharida with a home. This connection exemplifies the social organization of migration. Sharida’s aunts were the first migrant group in her family and they faced many barriers. They were able to share some information with Sharida (the second group) but Sharida still faced many barriers, herself. Sharida and her aunts lived in a Punjabi neighborhood in Queens which is one of many neighborhoods exemplifying chain migration in New York City. There were also supportive institutions like mosques and temples which helped Savi preserve her culture in America: “I still keep all my Indian tradition. Everything from my home, my tradition, my religion, everything. That is the beauty about America.” Interestingly, Sharida says she did not experience racism until this year, but potentially this is because she had been living in New York City which is highly diverse compared to other parts of America.
Despite the help from her aunts and the daughter community, Sharida faced too many barriers, and after six weeks in America, she left. What really drove Sharida away from America was the cultural difference: “the warmth that I had home […] it wasn’t here. Everybody to me was very cold. That’s because everybody was busy working.” She shares stories of her cordial neighbors in Trinidad and Tobago, sharing food with others before eating, herself, and going to the beach on weekends; all which contrasts life in New York City.
So, Sharida spent two years back in Trinidad and Tobago with her husband and son. While she was grateful to have that time with them, she still faced many challenges in Trinidad and Tobago. She wasn’t working at the time and she had to move in with her parents. Reflecting on her time in America, Sharida realized, “I didn’t accomplish what I wanted […] I couldn’t afford to send my son to a good school. I couldn’t get proper education.” Sharida solemnly shares the story of when the roof blew off her house and she lost many of her belongings. Somehow, she was able to find motivation in her difficult circumstances: “this is the things that happened that made me stronger to come back and to do what I had to do.”
On her second go, the embassy gave Sharida a ten-year visa. So she came back to New York and began looking for work, but Sharida reiterates that it’s hard to find a job in America when “you don’t have things like education.” This restates Piore’s dual-labor market theory in which capitalist American society requires higher education for primary sector jobs. With the help of an unemployment agency, Sharida got a job, off the books, as a nanny for a family with four children. She stayed with them for three and a half years, working almost every day of the week and without days off for her birthday or Christmas (the family was Jewish). Sharida emphasizes, “I didn’t care to not get a day off. I was here to accomplish something. I was here to make something of myself.” With this new job, Sharida was able to start renting a room out of a house and her son was attending a good school with the money she was sending to Trindad and Tobago. She did, however, ruin her visa by overstaying the initial six months.
After three and a half years with that family, people began advising Sharida to leave that job. Sharida, herself, did not want to quit because she was so determined to work, but the people in her life saw the emotional toll that job took on her. Sharida’s landlady put her in contact with Alisyn and Tim, the couple who she would go on to work for for the next sixteen years. Alisyn and Tim had just had twins (they later had a third child). The couple considered about twenty-five possible nannies for the job, but Sharida stood out to them for one main reason: “[Alisyn] would always say they will want so much money, or they want a phone. They always demanded what they want. I never asked for those things. I didn’t even ask how much they was going to pay or anything. I just wanted to get out.” The only problem standing in Sharida’s way of this dream job was that Alisyn and Tim needed to pay her on the books and she didn’t have a social security number. However, Sharida had gotten a tax ID and had been paying taxes as advised by her landlady. Sharida shares her advice, “I always believe if you’re taking from Uncle Sam, you have to give back some because if Uncle Sam survive, I would survive.” Luckily, she was able to use her tax ID as a social security number, and so she left the family that overworked her and joined this family who Sharida speaks so highly of: “I feel like part of this family. They always treat me nice, equal […] I really built myself with this job. I was able to finish send my son to school. I was able to build a home back home.”
Sharida was creating a more positive life for herself in America, but she dealt with the consequences of overstaying her visa: “my brother died; I couldn’t go home. My mother died; I couldn’t go home.” If she left the country, she would not be given another visa to return. Over time, Alisyn and Tim helped Sharida get a green card and a work permit and she is now a permanent resident. As we learned, permanent residents have all the same rights as citizens except for the right to vote, the right to certain government benefits, and the risk of being deported. Sharida can now file for citizenship but she seems rather content with the rights she has as a permanent resident. However, her two reasons for considering citizenship address the two rights she does not have as a permanent resident: “If Connecticut was a state where I thought Biden wouldn’t win, then I would have become a citizen before the vote” and “the reason I might do it though is because […] I will be able, if I grow older, take out like a pension.” Still considerably content with the rights she has, Sharida adds, “I think I would like to have somebody else have an opportunity.” Apart from personal reasons to not naturalize, Sharida adds, “last year, you couldn’t apply for citizenship, Trump ban everything. It was hard to get an interview.” As we discussed in class, President Trump has tried to suppress immigration from every angle including slowing down the naturalization process.
Sharida and her family.
Now that Sharida is a permanent resident, she can freely travel to Trinidad and Tobago again. She visits every year, though Covid prohibits her annual trip this December. Her son is now 29 years old and has stayed in Trinidad and Tobago his whole life. He finished school and got a good government job thanks to Sharida’s sacrifices. Therefore, Sharida accomplished what she had hoped for when coming to America: she created a better life for herself in America and a better life for her son in Trinidad and Tobago.
It was not difficult to draw connections between Sharida’s immigration experience and the topics we learned this year. She spoke openly about her motives for immigration, the process of going from a non-immigrant visa holder to a permanent resident, and the difficulties she faced adjusting culturally. But above all, Sharida is an example of hard work and joyful optimism. She has endured taxing jobs, long hours, and low wages. She missed important milestones in her son’s life and the deaths of her closest family members. Through it all, she had a goal to create a better life for herself and her son. She is clearly grateful for the opportunities America has given her, and America should be grateful for what immigrants like Sharida give it.
Macey Porter 0:00
This is a digitally recorded interview with Sharida Savi Sinanan. The interview was conducted by Macey Porter via Zoom on November 13, 2020, at approximately 3pm. Savi, thank you for agreeing to do this interview. I’m very excited to talk to you and hear about your experience immigrating from Trinidad and Tobago to the United States. But I know that you wanted to start by sharing the history of your great grandparents immigration, right, from India to Trinidad and Tobago.
Sharida Savi Sinanan 0:40
Yes. So my great grandparents migrated from India, in 1845, to Trinidad and Tobago, the island of Trinidad and Tobago. And I always say to myself, that there was a reason why they left India. Now, we have not been able to trace back as much as we would like to. But um, you know, the English are once ruled India, and they were like, over the Indians, they were like, dominated. So, English, the English man, the Master said to them, as they would say, to call him Master, let’s go to a land where there is milk and honey. And they agreed to leave and go to this land of milk and honey, as my great grandmother would describe it, I would often hear my grandmother speak of it, they came to the land of milk and honey. So they pack up and they left on this big ship, they call Fatel Razack. And they took everything, they took their plants, and their sugar cane and the rice and everything and they brought it to this country they never heard of, you know, and they said, okay, they’re going to be farmers, and they would plant and, and they did. So they get to Trinidad and Tobago, and you know, they continue working for the English guy, the English master. And they work rice, they work sugar cane so and they live like that. And they live in little barracks, they had them living in little barracks. And I always think probably the reason why they choose to leave India is because they were very poor. They must have been very poor. Because nobody would leave if they have everything. They would go to another country because they want better men[?] and more, you know, for the children, the grandchildren the… you know. So I think when I watch movies from India, and documentaries, and I see this slums, and I’m not ashamed to say it, I think that’s where my great grandparents came from. You know, that is why they wanted to come to a different land. So we got to Trinidad and you know, they work as farmers and they work very, very hard. They were called indentured laborers, not slave but indentured laborers. And, you know, from that my grandparents met and they got married, and my parents after that married, and we went to the country, there was like, town[?], just like, here we have town[?], you have like, Westport, I consider country because it’s more trees and more animals. Town[?] is to me is like New York. So we lived in the country and it’s very nice. But we were very poor. And we struggled. I… I left school at the age of 13, because my parents couldn’t afford to send me to school.
Macey Porter 4:13
What did your parents do?
Sharida Savi Sinanan 4:17
Oh, my father was also a laborer. And my mother was a normal housewife, cooking and cleaning. You know, and this is the thing that drives me to come, to go further because I didn’t just want to be a housewife just cooking and going grocery shopping and cleaning the house every day and I wanted more. You know, and my parents were very poor. And I came from five… from four sibling, five of us in all, and they couldn’t afford all of us. They had kids, but that that doesn’t mean we were starving. We had food. We had a bed to sleep, a nice little wooden house to live in, you know, but it wasn’t enough like they, they could only afford to send us to school at a certain age. And people from India always believed that children should have married off very young, which I think is [expression of disgust]. Anyway, so, you know, at the age of 13, I left school, they couldn’t send me to school, and I went to take care of my grandfather. I never, you know, I always wished that I could have gone to school more, because always say, if I had gone to school more, you know, I think I would have done better, like, maybe I would have a different job. You know, it might have been like, I always wanted to be a secretary, I always wanted, I always think the typewriter was very fun. Like it was always very fun. Maybe I should learn to do that. But my grandmother, of course, said no, you know, you need to learn other things. They send me to learn to sew, they send me to learn to make flowers, anything with crafts. But in my heart, I always wanted to go to school. But, you know, they needed me for other things. And I was quite happy to do it. I was quite happy to take care of my grandfather, I left school, I take care of my grandfather until I was 16 years old, he was blind, and diabetes. And, you know, nobody was there to take care of him. And I did it. And I was very happy to do it. But I always felt as though I could have done more with my… in the back of my head I would say, I wish I had done more, you know. But then if I have done more, I might not have had to have this job I am in right now. And I love this job. I love this family. Anyway, so I did that. And I took care of my grandfather. I didn’t go to school anymore. I learned to make flowers. Then my grandfather came and he died at age when I was 16 years old. And my aunt had a baby, of course, you know, when she had a baby and she was working, I had to take care of the baby. So again, I didn’t get to go to school, even you know at that age. So I took the baby until the baby died at 19. He was a little sickly. At the age of 19, I went out and I said you know what? I have no babies to take care of, no grandfather. I have nothing, I should look for a job. So I did went out and look for a job and it’s so funny, Macey, because the first day I look for a job, I got a job.
Macey Porter 7:51
Wow!
Sharida Savi Sinanan 7:52
I got a job!
Macey Porter 7:54
That’s lucky.
Sharida Savi Sinanan 7:55
Yes, the job was working in a flower shop. I love flowers. But I wasn’t hired to do flowers. There was, it was like flowers and gifts. It was like a shop like Saks Fifth Avenue. You have to be very rich to shop in it. It’s one of those. So then they hired me to work in the gift department, you know. But while I was working there, I used to watch the girl, the woman and them do the arrangements. And that’s how I learned. And after three years, I became a great florist. I am still a good florist. Like I would go home for Christmas. I don’t have time for myself, because when I have clients or when I go home, even if I say I’m not coming, I don’t know how they know I’m there. And I ended up I always end up doing all this work and I make money from it. But it’s not when I went home I wanted to just rest but anyhow, it’s a good thing. I ended up having a trade from all of this.
hmm.
Macey Porter 9:02
And what’s the pay? How was the pay at your flower job?
Sharida Savi Sinanan 9:08
It wasn’t great, but it was okay. I mean, I was living with my grandparents. Because I stayed home with my grandmother. I didn’t leave my grandmother after my grandfather died. I stayed with my grandmother. I love my grandmother. She only passed last year. And actually yesterday would have been her birthday if she was alive and she would have been 97 years old.
Macey Porter 9:32
Wow, that’s amazing!
Sharida Savi Sinanan 9:34
Her mother lived she was 103.
Macey Porter 9:38
You have some good genes!
Sharida Savi Sinanan 9:41
I hope I inherited! Um so yes, I did manage to become a florist at the age of 24, probably. And I got married at the age of 25 because Indian people have a saying, their daughters have to marry young because they think you need to have babies young. I used to fight them on it, but I would never win. I would never win my grandmother on this case. So I got married at the age of 25. But my husband is not a rich person. He was very poor. I had a hard life. I mean, you could put it in if you want, but it’s not… You don’t have to put it in your work. But I will tell you what really drive me to come into America.
Macey Porter 10:37
I would love to know, yeah.
Sharida Savi Sinanan 10:40
I got married and I had a baby. I have a son. He’s now 29 years old. And he still lives in my house, Macey! [laughing] So I got married, and I had a son after a year. But Hindus and Muslims, like in India, they don’t get along. They have that mentality where you have to marry into a Hindu home or Muslim after marriage into a Muslim home. It is always problems with religion. So my in laws never liked that I was a Muslim. So I had problems. I had a lot of problems. And then I was working. I wasn’t making enough money, I have a son to take care of my husband and I was working. He didn’t have a permanent job. I was the one who more or less had a permanent job because I had a working in a flower shop. And my job, I always had a job. He was a, he was a car mechanic. So some days he would have work and some days he wouldn’t. So it was, we was really struggling, it was hard for us to maintain a child and pay bills, and even have a normal sense for a little life. So I… It was very stressful. I couldn’t deal with it. And then I decided, hmm, one or two of my friends came to America, And they seems to be struggling [corrects herself] and doing well. They seem to be doing good. [Interruption] So I said maybe I should try. You know, maybe I should try to get a visa and go and see if I can make a better life for my son. Not for me, but for my son. I went into the… first of all to get to America, which people doesn’t understand, It’s very hard to get a visa to come here.
Macey Porter 12:47
Yes.
Sharida Savi Sinanan 12:48
You have to have so many things, so many ties and all like, you must have land on your name. You must have enough money in the bank. You must have a home on your name. So many things. Good job. You must have like show you have a good job, a good government job, something that they don’t want you coming into the embassy, American embassy to show that… you must have ties to come back to Trinidad. They don’t want you to come in and staying in America.
Macey Porter 13:22
Oh, they want you to come back, you’re saying.
Sharida Savi Sinanan 13:26
Yes. You must have ties. You cannot just… if they don’t see you have good ties to come back home, They don’t grant your visa.
Macey Porter 13:36
Interesting.
Sharida Savi Sinanan 13:37
Yeah. So I had land on my name because I inherited land from my grandparents. So I had that one tie and I had a job like from the flower shop. I was lucky enough to be granted a one year visa to come to America.
Macey Porter 13:53
Was it a work visa or a travel visa?
Sharida Savi Sinanan 13:57
Just a normal tourist visa.
Macey Porter 13:59
Tourist. Right.
Sharida Savi Sinanan 13:59
I’ll tell you how I get a work permit after. I came here. And when you come to America, You don’t just come in here and you could stay for that whole year. It is it doesn’t work like that. When when you come into JFK or whatever airport you land in America, whatever the immigration officer stamp on your passport is the time you stay. If they stamp three months, you cannot go beyond three months. You have to get out before that three months, they stamp six months… So you either get three months or six months. You have to leave before that time. If you don’t leave before that time, then you spoil your visa. You will end up staying here and become an immigrant or do you have that time on your visa, the one year, that doesn’t count. Right? So you have to get over before what they give you. Or you stay, and you work off the books. And you don’t have like a bank account. And you cannot have things because you don’t have like a social security number. And all these things and with all these things you cannot get a bank account open. Or you can’t even get a… if you’re not paying taxes, you can’t get a good job. So you do all these things like babysitting and working in a grocery, a nail salon, a hair salon, those things is what you could do. So one of the thing I admire most about us, like, most of us that come here, some of us ruin it, but most of them, they come they work, they go to school, they educate themselves, they get better jobs. Right. Some just remain and you know, to may be a nanny, taking care of old people, whatever. But we all you know, come for some point, because we want to send money back to the country. So the kids can have a better life. Some of them want to bring their kids here. They want to bring their family here. So they work and they save money and send back and they put money in the bank because if you don’t have over $40,000 in the bank, you cannot try to apply for visa as an instinctive[?]. So, when I came here for the one year, they gave me six months. I tried to get a job. I ended up getting a job, but the job the people…. it was very stressful. So I didn’t stay on the job. I went back home because I was missing… At that point, my son was what two years old. I was missing him. I was crying every day. I didn’t want to stay because I didn’t like America. I was like this is what everybody come to I don’t like it. I want to go back home.
Macey Porter 17:03
When you came that first time did you know anyone here? How did you find housing? How did you find that job?
Sharida Savi Sinanan 17:10
I have two aunts live in Queens in New York. I stayed with one of them. So they were here they were working and just struggling too, they didn’t have papers neither.
Macey Porter 17:23
I know that sometimes in cities like New York immigrant groups sometimes form their own little neighborhoods. Did you have one of those?
Sharida Savi Sinanan 17:33
A whole Punjabi Indian section!
Macey Porter 17:37
Yeah.
Sharida Savi Sinanan 17:39
Oh, when you want to smell curry go to that part of New York! [laughing] You would know when you get there you would smelly curry.
Macey Porter 17:47
Were there any other places for immigrants to meet up like we learned about churches are a big meeting point and I know that you’re both Hindu and Muslim. So did you have anything for that?
Sharida Savi Sinanan 18:02
Yes, there’s a lot of temples and mosques. There’s even a mosque right here the town next door. If I want to go there is a mosque there. And there’s a lot of Muslim Hindu temples in Queens. Actually, tomorrow is a big Hindu festival Diwali where they light all the lights my cousin’s celebrating that, so lots of food been cooking since yesterday. Different sweets and food and they would like lights tomorrow like candles. But there’ll be little clay container little clay pots with oil and they call them diyas. It’s actually celebrating right now in India because they are ahead time wise. So it’s Diwali tomorrow. Yeah.
Macey Porter 18:51
Wow!
Sharida Savi Sinanan 18:53
Yeah, there’s a lot of temples and mosques so it’s not hard to get to a mosque or a temple if I want to. That is why I keep the religion I keep my tradition and my culture. Everything, yes.
Macey Porter 19:05
That’s great.
Sharida Savi Sinanan 19:06
That’s the beauty about America, you could get to what you want.
Macey Porter 19:13
I want to get back to what you’re saying. Because you were telling me that you left America the first time you came here?
Sharida Savi Sinanan 19:21
It was like a whole stressful thing where I could not deal[?] I just wanted to go home. So I ended up staying, I think it was six weeks, and I went back home. And then I went back home and I went back home to the same thing that I left. And I did not accomplish what I wanted when I came here. So then I went back home for two years and I didn’t want to come back to America. I did not like it. I did not like America. I didn’t. I was like what it is people see here that they like?
Macey Porter 19:57
And was it because… because of your job? or what was it that you really didn’t like about America?
Sharida Savi Sinanan 20:05
Well, like for instance, home, you would wake up in the morning and they would walk out and you would see the neighbors and you would say, Good morning, and the neighbors would talk to you and you would do things and everybody like to me was more friendlier home than here. Here… back home, when you walk the street everybody that pass by they say good morning to one another, or good evening or “hello Mr. Sam. How are you today? Hello, Aunty. You okay? You need anything?” Here, I was walking down the street, And I would still be acknowledging people and say, Good morning, and people look at me, like, Where the hell you come from? Like…
Macey Porter 20:54
Especially in New York.
Sharida Savi Sinanan 20:56
Exactly. So, you know, like, all these different things as I was used to, I, it was hard for me to adjust to it. Like home, If my mom, when my mother cook or I cook, we would share things to people, we would give the neighbor some food, some dinner, or we have this big dirt[?] or we would make bread and make bread, we would not only make bread for itself, we would make bread for the neighbors. So that evening before we could sit down and eat, we share. We didn’t have those things here. So the warmth that I had home with that warm feeling, It wasn’t here. Everybody to me was very cold. That’s because everybody was busy working, you know, running around. The Life is so busy compared to like home on weekends, we would say, “okay, who going to the beach Sunday?” you know, and everybody will pack up and cook and go to the beach and spend the day on the beach and eat and play cricket, play football, which you call soccer. And we would have like this, and we would go hang out just on… we have these beautiful rivers with waterfalls, we will go hang out. You know we do things but here was all about work, work, work, work work. So that part of life I miss. So I didn’t want to live here. I didn’t like it. But then I went back home and I realized I didn’t accomplish what I wanted. I came to America. I didn’t work I came back home and did the same thing I left that, you know I couldn’t afford to send my son to a good school. I couldn’t get proper education. I remember when I was leaving to come to America. My son saw candy in the airport. And he said to me, Mommy, can I have one? And I said, I didn’t even have money to buy that candy. And I said to myself, I would never let this happen again. You know, but then I went back home and realized I didn’t do it. And I came back after two years. As much as I didn’t want to I said this is what I have to do. So I came back, I went back to the to the embassy because that one year visa was up. But because I didn’t overstay here that was a plus, I had. If I had overstayed I would not have gotten a visa. So because I only spent six weeks when I went back to the embassy, they grant me 10 years.
Macey Porter 23:37
Wow!
Sharida Savi Sinanan 23:38
Yes. So you either get one year or 10 years.
Macey Porter 23:43
Interesting.
Sharida Savi Sinanan 23:45
Yes. So some people are lucky and they will get 10 years the first time they go. Some people go and they get one year and when they go by the second time they get a next year. But they grant me the ten years visa. So I came back. And I went to my aunt and I stayed and I started to work out in Long Island. I started to work. First when I got here, It was March after 9/11 so that was what 20, 19 years ago. How long ago was it?
Macey Porter 24:20
Yeah. 2001. So 19 years ago.
Sharida Savi Sinanan 24:23
Right. So I came exactly six months after 9/11. So when I came here, it was hard to get a job because you know, you don’t have things like education and… I said okay, then I would do babysitting, or I would take care of a old person, anything I get. I am willing to do anything. So I went and as I, first of all in New York, it’s so busy. I had to learn everything on my own. I had nobody to take me around. Nobody to help me. I must have lost on that train like a million times. But the best thing of getting lost in New York, that’s the best way you can learn because then you figure it out on your own.
Macey Porter 25:13
That’s true.
Sharida Savi Sinanan 25:16
Right? I would end up sometimes in Williamsburg when I was supposed to be on Eastern Parkway. Oh, and end up in Coney Island when I was supposed to be in Queens. But I learned. And I signed up with an agency. And it was Passover. And the week after pass.. during the week of Passover, the agency called me and said, they have two interviews for me. So I signed up, let’s say Monday. I spent one weekend a weekend that same week weekend, I had two interviews. The first one, then we’ll call I think it was a little bit… that they wanted more like a white person and not a black person. Because the nanny they had she was from Poland. So I did everything. And I always thought I was going to get a job. But it turned out I didn’t. And I went on a next job in this same neighborhood the next day. And I got the job. Same neighborhood, just two streets down. I got the job. So I started the second week I got here. Off the books with this Jewish family with four kids. I did living… the kids was very, very nice. Macey, I, I had, I would say I love the kids more than the parents, honestly. And yes, I did work in with them. And it was nice. I spent three and a half years with them. I wasn’t happy too much with the parents, especially the mother. But I didn’t give up. You know, one of the things I’ve always asked myself, How people doesn’t work in this country and they survive? I don’t get it. Like to me, If I don’t work here, how would I live? How will I survive? You know? And it never, don’t matter how hard that job was Macey, I never give up. I used to cry on that job. And Alisyn always said to me, that’s what she admire most about me.
Macey Porter 27:50
That you fought through it, yeah.
Sharida Savi Sinanan 27:52
I fought my way I didn’t give up and I never left the job. And I worked with them for three and a half years, and when I said I wasn’t leaving, when I was leaving them, I said, This is so funny. So this is the best part about this job. I would I would stay they will never give me Christmas off because they were like strict Jews, and they don’t believe in Christmas. So Christmas, like they would send me out Christmas morning. And I would have to be back there by six o’clock Christmas Day. I cannot stay overnight. And the next day is my birthday. So my aunt used to always [call us?] “So these people cannot give you a little time off for two days?” But I didn’t give up that like to me, now I was on a work mode. I didn’t care to not get a day off. I was here to accomplish something. I was here to make something of myself. You know, I didn’t want to go back and just be that person anymore. So Alisyn called me. So I sat… so I decided to stay so I ruined my visa too. Because when I, although you get 10 years, you cannot stay here for 10 years. Whatever they give you at the airport is what you could stay.
Macey Porter 29:19
Right.
Sharida Savi Sinanan 29:20
So they gave me six months. So I said okay, I’ll do six months and go home. So I was working. And I was working for $280 a week. And I was working from Sunday till Friday evening. I used to work Saturdays they didn’t pay me some days because they wouldn’t pay me for weekends and stuff. But I didn’t mind You know, I was here I was… to me, I was here on a mission. You know, but then I spoil my visa because I decided okay I am here. I am making money. My son is going to school. I needed a home. I was so poor back home, Macey, I didn’t tell you this part: I had this little board house wooden house. And I was sleeping one Sunday. And all of a sudden, a hard breeze blew, and the whole roof blow away. So I lost everything in my little home. So, you know, this is the things that happened that made me stronger to come back to do what I had to do. So I didn’t have a home. I was living at my parents house. My son was going to school, you know, I wanted him to have all his books and obviously, so I went I that’s why I came back. And I said, this is it. This is what I have to do. And this is what will be done. And I came and I started to work and I said you know what I’m working I make good money, I will stay. But I didn’t come with the intention to stay. I came with the intention to go back after six months. But when I was working and realized I’m making money, okay, stay and do what you have to do, and then you’ll go home in a couple of years. So that’s what I did. So it wasn’t the best job. But I didn’t give up. So I started to rent an apartment, a little one bedroom from a house. So my landlady owned two floors in our house, but she was only renting one bedroom. And I would share her kitchen. So that’s what I did. I rent a one bedroom and I was sharing the kitchen with her because I will only come home on some Saturdays and go back Sunday. So it’s not like I was coming home every day. So when I decide when one day, snow fall was winter, and the bosses travel, they went away. And I took, well, they gave me a couple of days off. So I went, I went home to Brooklyn, but I did all I had to do and then I left. So I turn on the alarm. I locked the house and I left. We had a big snowstorm in New York. And wind and for some strange reason, The door blew open and the alarm went off. And they was away and the police call and I had to leave Brooklyn couldn’t get a train after five hours I was standing on a platform to get a train to go. Police was waiting at the door if I could lock back the door. Got out at a train, I had to walk like two miles hip high snow to get to the house. So this took like a complete day to do, a complete day. And when I got back home my landlady said to me “this is not right. People don’t treat people like this. You need to leave that job.” I said, “Leave the job where would I go? I don’t want to sit at home without pay?” Her sister was working with Alisyn and Tim’s friend who is a professor at Columbia University. So she said “I will ask Nadine to ask her boss if any of her friends is having a baby and need somebody.” I said “but it will be hard to get a job in Manhattan” because to get a job in Manhattan you have to have your papers you know your social security and your taxes. I didn’t have that. But I had a tax id because I always one thing I’ve always done since I got to this country, The first thing I did when I realize I was staying, I went and get a tax ID and started to pay taxes in this country. Although I’m an immigrant I was paying taxes.
Macey Porter 34:06
And how did you know to do that? or Why did you think to do that?
Right.
Sharida Savi Sinanan 34:10
My landlady advised me because she said it will come in handy one day and I did I’ll tell you why and how. So when I went… first before when Alisyn call, I was on this other job still. And after, this was like a month and a half after. And it’s so happened that Friday. I couldn’t leave before I put on their lights and I had to make sure everything off because they cannot, these Jewish people don’t turn on lights for Sabbath and don’t light the stove and all these things. So I was walking to the train that evening and I was saying, “wow, Maybe I wouldn’t get a job again. Maybe this is the job I’m supposed to stay on.” And there I was walking through the train station and I stand on the platform. And the phone rang, and it was Alisyn. I just I couldn’t believe it. I was like, What? Because I just said to myself, like 10 minutes ago, maybe nobody want anybody to work so. And she said, “Hi, I’m Alisyn. Nadine…” which was, which is our friend, you know, she explained. And she said, “I would like to meet you. We have twins. And they just came out of the hospital and we would love to meet you.” And I said, Sure. So she gave me the address and next morning, I went to meet them, Alisyn and Tim. But when I went to meet Alisyn and Tim I was still on this other job. So I said to Alisyn and Tim, they sat down and they interview me. Tim was at the table. Alisyn there. The baby nurse is from my country, a bald head woman, which was the most unfriendly person you will ever meet in your life, Macey. The woman was so unfriendly. She didn’t want me touch Ale and Cesa. She didn’t want me to go close to them. But I’ll explain all of that as I go along.
Macey Porter 36:14
Okay.
Sharida Savi Sinanan 36:16
So we had this interview and everything. And it went well. And I really wanted this job. I really, really, I, the job I was on in Long Island, it was so hard, Macey. They had… every weekend they would entertain and they would have three, four Jewish family come over. And I would have like 18 or 20 children all together to see about. And it was really, really had. But I never give up. And I remember after the interview Alisyn walk me to the door, and I said to her, I said, “Alisyn, I promise you, if you hire me, I would work very, very hard for you. That you wouldn’t regret if you hire me.” And she said she always says she remembers that as the one thing. Because she said she admired me for how hard the job was. I didn’t give up. But she didn’t say she was hiring me. So that was just the interview. She said she would call me back to work with them for one day. So it was like a whole process. After I gotta realize why she had this whole process. Alisyn interview, like 25 people for this job. And everybody would come in and work like a day or she would interview them. And she would always say they will want so much money or they want a phone. They always demanded what they want. I never asked for those things. I didn’t even ask how much they was going to pay or anything. I just wanted to get out. So I went back on the job and I was working and everything and then the next weekend Alisyn called me and said come in. She wanted me to work so I went the Saturday and I work and it was very nice. Ale and Cesa, I love them the second I saw them. Twins. Wow! You know, so I work and I like it. But she still didn’t give me answer. So I went back to the old job. So then Alisyn interviewed like 25 people that should break it down to 15. And she break it on the 10. She break it down to five. I was in the last five I was in the last three. And then I was the one to pick. The only problem there was having, because they have to pay me on the books. I didn’t have a social. but thank god to my landlady. She said, “Tell them take your tax ID number and ask their lawyer or their accountant if this could work as a social.” And it did. So thank God, I was paying taxes in this country from the time I got here.
Macey Porter 39:19
Yes.
Sharida Savi Sinanan 39:20
I always believe if you’re taking from Uncle Sam, you have to give back some because if Uncle Sam survive, I would survive. Right? So when they said the tax id would work. She called me and said “okay, tax id can work. You’re hired!” I’m like, “wow, I’m hired! Na na na na na, I am leaving!” [laughing]
Macey Porter 39:51
Did you turn in your, your badge that day?
Sharida Savi Sinanan 39:57
Yes. Wait till you hear this story though. I said to Alisyn in the interview, which I would never do to anybody. If you hire me, because I’m so attached to the kids, I don’t want them to… not the parents, the kids. I don’t want them to have a hard time to settle with somebody else. I would ask you to give me two weeks so that they will get somebody for the kids. Alisyn didn’t wanna wait two weeks, she wanted to wait one week, so that we know when I decide, okay, she hired me, I went in a Sunday. So my boss lady would go to the gym on a Monday morning, she has gone to go to the gym, they would come back and they would shower. And they will go out for the whole day and shop and whatever. I Come in and I stay in the kitchen. She in the kitchen call she friend and talking to the friend about all the plans for the day. Her husband in the shower upstairs she’s in a towel and robe talking on the phone. And was… oh and I could never call them by a first name. I always had to call them by their last name, Dr. and Mrs. Goldstein. So this is me now. But I wasn’t looking at her. “Mrs. Goldstein when you have a minute I would like to speak to you please.” She goe, “Suzanne. I have to call you back.” She was talking to a woman named Suzanne. Suzanne I have to call you back. So she say… now the baby when I got there a week after she had a baby. So the baby grew up with me for three and a half years. And the baby used to call me Eya Beya. She couldn’t say Sharida so she used to call me Eya Beya. Like any morning I will come upstairs. She will come downstairs you actually have to she bumps in on the step. bump. You hear, “Eya. Eya Beya, were are you? Were are you?” and she would run and come because I’ll be drinking coffee and waiting for them to come downstairs to get ready to go to school. So this, they all started calling me Eya Beya. So she goes, “Eya Beya, Why are not looking at me?” I say, “I would like to speak to you and Dr. Goldstein, if you have a minute, please.” She goes, “Eya, Don’t tell me You’re going to do me what I think in my mind right now that you’re going to do.” Okay? “Mrs. Goldstein, I got another job. And it’s what I want. You know, I want to go home every day. You know, I want to be more free, you know, be able to do something more with my life. And this job is offering me all of this.” She said, “Eya. You cannot leave me.” So she husband was in the shower. The woman in call, She has to go upstairs. She goes., “Cliff! Cliff! Get down here right now. Get down here. Eya is leaving us.” the man come out the bathroom wrapped in a towel alone and run down the step. He leaned up on the fridge, “Eya, you cannot leave us.” I said, “Dr. Goldstein. Honestly, I get a job and I’m really happy with it. And I really hope that you know, I can help you look for somebody before I leave. I don’t want anything from you guys. All I want is a good reference. I don’t need anything. Just please give me a good reference. And I’m here for two weeks. I will help you look for somebody.” The man never ate for a whole week, Macey. the man lost eight pounds. Every day this man begging me to stay. every day. “Eya” He wants to buy this for me he want to buy a computer for me. He wants to do it everything for me. He telling all my friends, “talk to Sharida, please, talk to Sharida.” one of my friends said to her, “Well, when you had her you did not appreciate her. So now she got the next job. And she leaving.” Because all my friends used to say they would never do all the things I did on that job,
Macey Porter 44:35
You put up with a lot.
Sharida Savi Sinanan 44:37
Yeah, I really put up. Macey, I didn’t even tell you what I put up with. So they call the agency that I got a job with with them. And the agency started sending people over. So everybody that’s come I mean, like about 20 people come that week they didn’t like nobody. They don’t like nobody, they don’t want nobody. He only wants me. Until She said to him, “Why are you begging her? Let her go!” she was the mean one and not him she was always the meaner one. So the night he come home and Alisyn and Tim call and they say um you know, “we call because we hiring Sharida and We want to get your, you know, your reference.” I remember him saying to Alisyn and Tim, “what can I tell you? You have just taken the best thing that ever passed through my home. I trust her with my kids I trust her with my home. You have just taken the best thing.” So the girls are just come out the hospital Ollie and Chesa. And he being an obstetrician gynecologist, Alisyn was asking him questions. And this is she she’s still alone. She’s still alone. She goes, why are you answering their questions? Let him be a doctor and ask those questions. doesn’t tell you how she is, you know. And then after all the stress that week, he didn’t want nobody. And he was like, I couldn’t make a second week. I just left. I couldn’t do it. I couldn’t get him that second week. So I left and I started over with Alisyn on Monday. I didn’t have no time off. And I started to work. And so I’ve been at Alisyn almost… May next year would make me 16 years with Alisyn.
Macey Porter 46:35
Wow.
Sharida Savi Sinanan 46:37
I have had the greatest journey with Alisyn and Tim. I feel like part of this family. They always treat me nice equal. They always there for me when I needed them. Yeah, and I really built myself in this job. You know, I was able to finish send my son to school. I was able to build a home back home. Because I don’t want to stay here. I still want to go back home.
Macey Porter 47:08
So, right ,you had your 10 year visa, but you said that…
Sharida Savi Sinanan 47:13
Yeah. So that’s spoiled.
Macey Porter 47:15
How often were you going back and whatnot?
Sharida Savi Sinanan 47:17
I couldn’t go home. If I had gone home, I would not have been able to come back to this country, I would have to wait 10 years before I could apply. So let me tell you how hard it was for me, Macey. My brother died, I couldn’t go home. My mother died. I couldn’t go home. I couldn’t go for none of these funeral. But my mother had always said to me, “don’t come back until you accomplish what you want.” So I went through the whole process at getting Alisyn and Tim helped me to get the green card. And that’s how I was able to get a work permit from that. And that’s how I got everything to straighten out and become… I am a permanent resident right now. But I am allowed to file for citizenship. So right now I could file for citizenship I have I have the amount of years in there that I could file. Now, if Connecticut was a state where I thought Biden wouldn’t win, then I would have become a citizen. before the vote.
Macey Porter 48:34
Yes.
Sharida Savi Sinanan 48:35
So because I know it’s a state where most democrats win, I didn’t hesitate. Also, there was another problem with Trump and immigration. Last year, you couldn’t apply for citizenship, Trump ban everything. It was hard to get an interview. You know, but hopefully, now I’ll get you know, I’ll do it. But-
Macey Porter 49:02
-Is that something you want to do?
Sharida Savi Sinanan 49:06
Um, the reason I might do it though is because, I would have like, I will be able if I grow older take out like a pension. But I honestly always try, you know, for me, I think I would like to have somebody else have an opportunity. Like, if I was to stay here and take then, somebody else wouldn’t get that chance. That’s what I think. But they say doesn’t work like that. So I may apply for it next year. And become a citizen. And hopefully Kamla will be the next President and I will be able to vote for the first president. woman president. We’ll see. We’ll see. though. Yeah, that’s how it how it worked out for me and I was able, I was able to see much more, my brains expand more. I was able to. And the nice thing about America Macey, I could go to school and learn if I want now, I could go to school and actually do something now. Because I have that opportunity and I have the time. So, it have done, America have done well for me. It’s a country I will always look up to. And always say this is the country that helped me to accomplish and to be where I am today.
Macey Porter 50:37
That’s really amazing to hear you say after you also shared the story of your first time coming and how you left in tears.
Sharida Savi Sinanan 50:47
Yeah. That’s a country would have a spot in my heart. If I had stayed in Trinidad, I would not have accomplished the things I’ve done. I would not have even seen the places I’ve seen or met the beautiful people I’ve met. Like I always loved going into New York, if you want a final language from any part of the world, or person from any part of the world just go to New York. That is the beauty about here. You know? So in spite everything I love America.
Macey Porter 51:29
And so America has this place in your heart you say? Of course, Trinidad, I’m sure has a maybe even bigger part of your heart.
Sharida Savi Sinanan 51:41
Yeah. Or, maybe equal?
Macey Porter 51:43
Equal, Yes.
Sharida Savi Sinanan 51:44
But if you have asked me that 20 years ago, I would say no.
Macey Porter 51:50
Right.
Sharida Savi Sinanan 51:52
It grew on me.
Macey Porter 51:53
How often do you communicate with your family?
Sharida Savi Sinanan 51:58
Oh, so I go home every year now. Unfortunately, because of COVID I’m not going this Christmas.
Macey Porter 52:07
Yeah.
Sharida Savi Sinanan 52:08
But it’s okay. I can communicate with my family everyday FaceTime, phone. so you know, it’s not only me alone like I say is in this, my aunts, my cousins, my friends, everybody not going on this year. So it is what it is until it get better. So we’re in for the long haul and we will stay here until America, something good will happen. I believe it will happen soon. So ask any question you want. I probably missed out a lot. If you ask anything, I’ll answer.
Macey Porter 52:51
Well, Thank you. I mean, you told me a lot.
Sharida Savi Sinanan 52:57
I still keep, I still keep all my Indian tradition. Everything from home, my tradition, my religion, everything. That is the beauty about America, you could still keep everything. You know, you’re not entitled to only be one religion or two religion. You could be whatever you want here.
Macey Porter 53:22
I don’t know if this is too personal. But have you ever experienced any kind of like prejudice in America?
Sharida Savi Sinanan 53:30
Oh, yes. Yes, I have. And it didn’t never dawned on me before until COVID. This year. One morning, you know, went to the grocery. And this is a grocery I will go to trade every week. And of course, I didn’t know they open, first all the groceries was open. And I guess they would open nine o’clock. The groceries are all open eight o’clock, and they would have this hour for you know older people to go. And then regular and then there was only taking in a couple of people. And it was still cool. It was in March. And I got there and I didn’t realize they open at nine and they had all the older people going in first. There was nobody in line. Nobody. Nobody in the grocery. And it was this girl and she’s like I said, not only me there was another nurse, a white woman, nurse. And the next woman, my complexion in line. And the nurse came in and she said “if the grocery is empty, why can’t they go in and shop?” She said “no. You have to wait until the time to go in.” She said “Well, that’s ridiculous. Why would you do that? Why can’t they go in and shop?” I started to cry because then I realized for the first time I experienced it where your skin color really tells a different in this country. I never felt it in New York. You know? I felt it when we move here. Because Westport as you know, and your mother that is very white. I outshine. you could find me in any crowd in Westport. I am one of a kind. But for the first time I felt it was that morning when she could have let us in. And the nurse said to her “I don’t understand why you’re doing this. Why can’t you let them in the grocery empty? Why can’t you let them in?” So I came home and I was crying. And I said to Tim, for the first time in my life, I felt like this. I never experienced it. I would always make fun of it. I would always say, outshine everybody could find me in Westport. [laughing] Yeah, but yeah, that was the only time.
Macey Porter 56:12
I’m sorry you experiences that.
Sharida Savi Sinanan 56:15
It’s okay, Lovey. It is what it is until things calm down You know, like I said to Alisyn, it’s so hard to talk to people now because everybody’s so angry. You know? But hopefully it’ll calm down in time.
Macey Porter 56:31
Yes. So your son, did you say he lives with you now?
Sharida Savi Sinanan 56:39
Not here. Okay. So he went to school and he was able to go to college and everything. And he was very lucky that he, as soon as he finished, he got a job that he loves. And it’s a government job and having a government job back home is a good thing. So he was lucky after, you know, going to school and in everything he accomplish. You know, he get everything. So come into America work for me. I’m Eddie Murphy! I’m coming to America! [laughing] Yes, so it did work out he got a job. He stay home. He don’t want to come here. He doesn’t have no desire to like, maybe a vacation but not to come and live. Cause he have a good job. Yeah. So sometimes when an immigrant come, it can work out because then you can not bring your family and you can accomplish what you want back home and they ended up getting the good jobs and good living and stay.
Macey Porter 57:41
Right. I think that shows how, you know, you were saying you wanted that better job and whatnot in Trinidad, but you didn’t have your education and for you coming to America was the better option. But then for your son, he was able to get that in Trinidad.
Sharida Savi Sinanan 57:58
Mm hmm. So it work out that way.
Transcribed by https://otter.ai
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